


Monastery Mixups

by baylisself



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: AU-Same setting but they all have phones, Anyone can change houses, Byleth is confused, Comedy, Eventual Romance, Everyone lives, F/M, Fluff and Humor, Humor, M/M, Misunderstandings, chatfic, dimileth, no beta we die like Glenn, sylvix - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-04
Updated: 2019-12-20
Packaged: 2020-11-23 03:34:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 20,147
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20885459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baylisself/pseuds/baylisself
Summary: In this entire school evidently there was no one better suited to this position than Byleth, a girl with no formal education and zero teaching experience. But she was not going to back down now, the Ashen Demon relished a challenge. This couldn't be that difficult, right?orWanted to explore Byleth being an experienced mercenary, with like no knowledge of inter-personal relationships.  AU where everyone lives and can change houses and has magical communication devices (i.e. phones).   Just some fun fluff, humor & romance, with some chatting thrown in. Everyone is over 18, and this is fiction - obviously do not date your professor irl!Heaviest emphasis on Dimileth & Sylvix.





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> KnightSquadRiseUp = Ingrid  
LadiesMan69 = Sylvain  
URWeak = Felix  
MemeTimeHasArrived = Claude  
DelicateFlwrPwr = Hilda  
AngryDeathCannon = Lysithea

Byleth stared at the chalkboard in front of her, as though she would be able to discern its potential weaknesses with enough study. But this battle was different, one she was wholly unaccustomed to. The Archbishop had assigned her as lead professor to the Blue Lion House. At first, Byleth had thought there was some kind of misunderstanding, but no. In this entire school evidently there was no one better suited to this position than her, a girl with no formal education and zero teaching experience. But she was not going to back down now, the Ashen Demon relished a challenge. This couldn't be that difficult, right?

She cleared her throat and turned to the students. "Ahem." Every eye in the class was upon her. Byleth stood silently for a moment and was at a loss. What exactly does a professor *do* anyways?

Dimitri, house leader (and the only student she actually knew by name), tentatively raised his hand. He was sitting in the front row, looking eager and expectant. She assumed he was stretching, but after a minute his hand was still up. What an odd position to sit in, did he have a cramp? Another minute passed, and Dimitri’s face was beginning to turn a funny red color. “Are you well Dimitri?” Byleth asked.

Dimitri coughed, “I'm fine Professor. Pardon me, if I may? Perhaps we could begin by introducing ourselves? I am familiar with everyone here, but I’m sure some of the students would appreciate a chance to know more about their fellow classmates.”

"Ah, yes, I suppose that seems appropriate," she said. Apparently Dimitri had been trying to help her. Was the raised hand his attempt at some kind of secret signal? It had been quite conspicuous. She pulled a small journal from her pocket - Jeralt had given it to her years ago for her to jot down battle tactics and training observations. She would write her observations about the students here and perhaps that would help her come up with some kind of plan. She flipped to a new page and made a note: _Dimitri: not good at subterfuge; keep away from reconnaissance missions_

Silence fell again. After a few moments, Dimitri coughed again. “Shall… shall I begin, Professor? Or perhaps you would like to start?” He was trying to help her again! Byleth made another note: _Dimitri: helpful, good leadership skills_

"Very well, my name is Byleth." She looked back to Dimitri. She noticed that his face was still pink, perhaps he had a fever? He had also coughed twice so far, in a matter of minutes. But he had also said he was fine when she had asked if he was well... did he not want to show his fragility to others? "Dimitri, I see that your face is quite flushed. It is a notable goal to hide weakness when dealing with an enemy. But if we are to be allies you must be honest with us. If you cannot admit when you are sick or injured, it will certainly prove a hindrance to our team.”

Dimitri's face seemed to get even redder, and his body appeared somewhat stiff. Byleth felt her hands inching towards her sword, an automatic response to his tensed muscles. "I'm fine!" He squeaked. So Byleth sat back and added another note: _Dimitri: bad liar, obviously hiding something_

“This is going swimmingly! Really fantastic!!” a red-headed boy in the back row said. He was fairly tall and lanky and somewhat muscular. With some work, he could have the build for a decent fighter. His face had a huge smile, and he was leaning back with his hands behind his back, and one foot crossed up across the other. He looked very relaxed. “My name is Sylvain, by the way. Sylvain Jose Gautier, heir to House Gautier. If you’d like some extra help with all of this stuff Professor, I’d be more than happy to give you some ideas, say… over dinner tonight?”

“Why not now?” she asked in confusion.

“Uh… well, I was actually hoping to get to know you a little better. You know, on a personal level. Me, you, a nice dinner with flowers, maybe some music, who knows what might happen?” he winked.

Was the wink some kind of secret signal as well? Byleth would need to brush up on these things, perhaps there was a book that covered student/teacher communication? Her days as a mercenary had not been this confusing. Thankfully, Dimitri spoke up again, “Please don’t mind him, Professor! Sylvain’s somewhat of a …. Ah, how to put it...”

A blonde haired girl sitting next to Dimitri added, “An incorrigible skirt-chaser.” She was sitting straight and her hands were folded neatly on the table. As she had Byleth's attention, she continued, “My name is Ingrid Brandl Galatea, it’s a pleasure to meet you Professor! I was childhood friends with His Highness, Sylvain, and Felix. I hope to someday become a Knight in service to the Royal House.”

Byleth wondered vaguely what a “skirt-chaser” was. She had heard rumors of dancers on the battlefield that could empower their allies with speed and movement, solely through the magic of dance. She had never actually seen one before, but it certainly seemed reasonable that they would wear skirts. She would have to look into that as well. She was glad the school had a library.

She added two more notes- _Sylvain: good potential build for axe, dancer??_ & _Ingrid: good posture, possible mounted position, likes knights_

A slender boy seated next to Sylvain suddenly snapped, “This is a waste of time. Why don’t we go to the training yard and actually *show* you what our skills are? That way we can see your skills as well. Actions speak louder than words.” He had dark hair and it was pulled back with a few loose strands around his face. Although he wouldn’t meet her gaze directly, Byleth could tell he was appraising her from the corner of his eye.

“Hmmm,” Byleth said and she brought her hand up to her chin. She hadn’t actually been aware that was an option… it WOULD be much better to evaluate them in the training yard. Maybe future classes could just be held there?

“Oh my, let’s not be hasty. I’m sure there will be plenty of opportunities for that later,” said a pale-haired girl that looked a bit older than the other students. “By the way Professor, my name is Mercedes. Healing is my specialty. I just love helping others, it gives me strength.”

The dark-haired boy snorted. “Hmph. Being capable gives you strength.”

“Come now Felix, be nice or the others will form bad opinions of you. My apologies Professor, Felix has a sharp tongue, but he’s a decent person deep down. We’ve been friends for quite some time,” Dimitri said.

"No one asked you, Boar. Besides, I’m not your *friend*, and I couldn’t care less about others' opinions of me," Felix snapped at him.

A very large boy sitting on the other side of Dimitri spoke then, “Are you speaking to His Highness? Friend or no, your language is unacceptable. You should show him the respect he deserves.” His voice was low and almost melodic.

Felix stood up then, glowering, “I AM showing him the respect he deserves, dog. Perhaps it is *you* that doesn't know him as well as you think.”

Dimitri put an arm on the large boy’s arm. “Now, now Dedue, it’s alright. Felix speaks his mind and I encourage that.”

“Let’s all get along,” Byleth interrupted. Byleth noted that Felix had nicknamed two of his classmates after animals - he must have an affinity for beasts. By his fluid movements, Byleth would have assumed he was a swordsman like herself, but perhaps she could assign him to stable duty? "So I see that you like animals. Do you want to be a knight also?" she asked him, as she added more notes - _Mercedes: calm, healer_; _Dedue: protective, large build - unarmed combat?_

Felix's eyes widened. "Wh...What? Why would you ever think that?"

"Oh, so not knighthood then? Is your fondness towards animals purely recreational then?"

There was a sudden silence and then Sylvain started laughing hysterically. Felix's face had turned as red as Dimitri's. Oh no, was this mystery illness contagious? Byleth took a step back, she didn't want to get sick as well.

Dimitri was staring at her with his mouth wide open and the other students were murmuring amongst themselves. Felix spluttered, "I don't even *like* animals! I like the sword!" Sylvain fell out of his seat he was laughing so hard.

Felix sat back down and stared at his desk pointedly, his arms crossed. Byleth added a note: _Felix likes swords. May be in denial over animals?_ "I see. Very well, who is next?" she asked.

“Oh oh, me Professor!” a short girl next to Mercedes popped up, knocking her books off the desk in the process. “Oh no! Sorry about that." She continued to talk as she attempted to pick up her mess. "My name is Annette Dominic! Mercedes and I graduated from the Royal School of Sorcery, so we’re really close! I promise I’ll try my best to learn as much as I can to be useful on our team!” she was practically vibrating from excitement. _Annette: clumsy; sorcery skills_

Sylvain had evidently regained his seat. He was leaning forward now, still smiling. “Wow, two cute girls in our class, this year is gonna be great!” Sylvain said. Ingrid shot him a death glare. “Aww sorry Ingrid, did I forget about you? I can definitely count you too if you want. Besides, I don’t discriminate, I happily chase handsome guys as well." he said grinning widely at Felix. Felix didn’t see him, as he was still boring holes in his desk with his eyes. "Although maybe I'd have more luck if I was cute and fluffy, like a baby animal."

"I'll kill you," Felix muttered, as he kicked Sylvain's leg.

Byleth frowned, there must be some animosity between the two if Felix was threatening murder. Perhaps she should assign them to stable duty *together*, so they could form a closer bond?

Byleth turned her gaze to the only student left, a willowy boy with grey hair, and nodded at him to proceed. “Uh, hi everyone, my name is Ashe Ubert. My adoptive father, Lord Lonato, sent me here and I’m deeply grateful for the opportunity. I hope we can all be friends! I too would like to be a Knight someday,” he smiled at Ingrid. _Ashe: likes knights; small build, agile hands. thief or archery?_

Felix grumbled something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like “stupid fools.”

Byleth closed her journal as she was finished with taking notes. Then she sighed. She was about 15 minutes into what was supposed to be a 3 hour session, and she was already more tired than she would be taking on an entire camp of bandits. Why had she ever agreed to this?

****

LadiesMan69 made a new group "BL-Recruit"  
LadiesMan69 added KnightSquadRiseUp, URWeak, MemeTimeHasArrived, DelicateFlwrPwr, AngryDeathCannon

LadiesMan69: srsly u guys need to join BL

MemeTimeHasArrived: boys love?

DelicateFlwrPwr: hells ya bois, I'm down for that

MemeTimeHasArrived: Yas queen!

LadiesMan69: yes! but also no. New prof is un.fuckin.belivbl

URWeak: I'm already in BL

LadiesMan69: I've been waiting for u 2 say that 4vr

URWeak: fuck you, not that BL

KnightSquadRiseUp: so Felix, do I need to keep u away from my horsie? cause…

LadiesMan69: it's only recreationally. no big deal? ;;;;;;)

URWeak: shut the fuck up

LadiesMan69: anyways he loves teh ‘sword’ rmbmer?

DelicateFlwrPwr: omg wtf

MemeTimeHasArrived: …

URWeak has left the chat

LadiesMan69: lolololo

LadiesMan69: chk this, princely is totally in luv w/prof

DelicateFlwrPwr: waT!

AngryDeathCannon: why am I in this chat?

LadiesMan69: cuz ur mad scary

MemeTimeHasArrived: our sweet lilD has a crush? This I gotta c

DelicateFlwrPwr: lilD…

LadiesMan69: ಠ_ಠ

DelicateFlwrPwr: not touchin that

MemeTimeHasArrived: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

KnightSquadRiseUp: ew

LadiesMan69: Felix at my door, he gnna kill me

KnightSquadRiseUp: RIP

LadiesMan69: noes he has a swrd!

LadiesMan69 has left the chat

DelicateFlwrPwr: Im in! Prof said yes

MemeTimeHasArrived: srsly wtf hilda u can't lv me!

DelicateFlwrPwr: she said you can come 2

MemeTimeHasArrived: yassssss bff

MemeTimeHasArrived: wait, am leader boi

MemeTimeHasArrived invited LorenzHellmanGloucester to the chat

MemeTimeHasArrived changed LorenzHellmanGloucester to L4Loser

L4Loser had joined the chat

MemeTimeHasArrived: Hey everyone, Lorenz has kindly volunteered to take over!

L4Loser: Indeed Claude, I wish you well! I, Lorenz Hellman Gloucester will take my rightful place as Golden Deer leader

L4Loser: …

L4Loser: who assigned this name? It is unacceptable!!

MemeTimeHasArrived has left the chat  
DelicateFlwrPwr has left the chat  
KnightSquadRiseUp has left the chat

AngryDeathCannon: sorry loser, I'm switching too, and I'm taking thrysus wit me

AngryDeathCannon has left the chat

L4Loser: … :(

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry Lorenz!  
Love any comments/kudos :)


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> KnightSquadRiseUp = Ingrid  
LadiesMan69 = Sylvain  
URWeak = Felix  
GentleGiant = Dedue  
TastyTreat = Mercedes  
PureBoi = Ashe  
StormKitten = Annette  
MemeTimeHasArrived = Claude  
DelicateFlwrPwr = Hilda  
AngryDeathCannon = Lysithea  
Marianne = Marianne

KnightSquadRiseUp formed the group BlueLions

KnightSquadRiseUp: Hi everyone! Professor asked me to make this grp so we can talk amongst ourselves.

KnightSquadRiseUp: Normally this would be done by the House Leader, but he is… unavailable atm

TastyTreat: Oh dear, why?

KnightSquadRiseUp:...

GentleGiant: His Highness has broken his phone

LadiesMan69: snappd it like a toothpck lol

URWeak: hahaha. Stupid boar

GentleGiant: watch it

KnightSquadRiseUp added MemeTimeHasArrived, DelicateFlwrPwr, AngryDeathCannon, Marianne

KnightSquadRiseUp: Also, I’d like to welcome the newest 4 to our class: Claude, Hilda, Lysithea, and Marianne

PureBoi: Hi guys!

MemeTimeHasArrived: thks for invite!

TastyTreat: Welcome to the Blue Lions!

StormKitten: Oh neat, looking forward to wrkng w/u all!

DelicateFlwrPwr: guys, prof gave me homewrk, but i’m not feeln good, thnk i have a cold…

TastyTreat: Sorry to hear that Hilda, shall I come take a look? I do have some healing spells

DelicateFlwrPwr: uhhh nooo, don’t thnk it can be heald, itsreally bad

PureBoi: My adoptive father, Lord Lonato always said it was important to help those in trouble. Do you want help with your homework Hilda??

DelicateFlwrPwr: thank you so much Ashe, you are such a sweetheart

MemeTimeHasArrived:... ashe…about hilda…

DelicateFlwrPwr: shut yur mouth

StormKitten: Did everyone get their new tasks from the professor? I’m so excited to get started!!

GentleGiant: yes :(

PureBoi: whats wrong Dedue?

GentleGiant: she told me to drop armor and pick up unarmed. She said i was too slow :(

URWeak: well ya.

URWeak: she attacked you four times before you swung once. And then you missed

GentleGiant: how can i protect his highness w/no armor??

KnightSquadRiseUp: I understand Dedue, but the prof literally, LITRLY ran circles around u. U might need to wrk on ur speed

MemeTimeHasArrived: she put me on flying duty. So i feel ya man

LadiesMan69: ugh, i’m on flying duty too. And axe. No more lance for me :(

DelicateFlwrPwr: omgsh rlly? That is great. I’m on flying duty too. Good luck u 2! i’ll cheer u on

MemeTimeHasArrived: shit

KnightSquadRiseUp: huh, thats a lot of flyers. I’m on flying also

PureBoi: she told me i need to work on strength. Lord Lonato got me interested in knights, and I know knights need to be strong, but…

MemeTimeHasArrived: dude, i saw u hit that apple from across the yard

PureBoi: yeah! Lord Lonato always said I’m pretty accurate, which is why i picked up archery…

MemeTimeHasArrived: u hit the apple, and it didn’t even move. I ddn’t even know that was pssbl

PureBoi: :( I don’t know how to tell Lord Lonato this

URWeak: ur weak

AngryDeathCannon: Say Lord Lonato one more time. Ashe.

AngryDeathCannon: i dare u

PureBoi: Lord Lonato?

MemeTimeHasArrived: holy shit, lysithea has fireballs in her hands

KnightSquadRiseUp: run ashe

Marianne: ….hi…

DelicateFlwrPwr: Hiii Marianne!!

TastyTreat: Hi Marianne! Did you get a new assignment too?

Marianne:... uhh, i’m adjutant to felix

LadiesMan69: WaT!?

DelicateFlwrPwr: WHAT!

URWeak: …

URWeak: i don’t want to talk about it

KnightSquadRiseUp: u know thats just gonna make us suppppperrr curious right?

LadiesMan69: tell me more Marianne :))))

Marianne: ...i’m sorry. I didn’t know that Felix doesn’t want to talk about it. I’ll leave…

DelicateFlwrPwr: Felix, watch yourself, i’ll skin u if u hurt Marianne

URWeak: i’m not gonna hurt her, wtf

  
*****

Over the last two days, Byleth had evaluated each student and created a personalized training plan. That had been easy enough. But then there had been paperwork… so much paperwork. More paperwork than she had done previously in her entire life combined. Now she had a crick in her neck and the beginnings of a headache. It was evening now and she headed to the training grounds in the hope that her normal training routine would help loosen her up. But all she succeeded in doing was making her headache worse.

She set the practice sword into the weapon rack and groaned when she saw a pair of black leather gloves on the ground. Yet another piece of junk someone had left behind - that was like the 8th one today! She couldn’t believe the lack of discipline these kids (and even teachers!) showed when it came to their belongings. She was tempted to start throwing it all in the trash.

Gloves in hand, she marched to DImitri’s room. She was pretty sure they belonged to him, she had seen him wearing a similar pair earlier. She knocked loudly, and Dimitri swung open the door. “Pro..professor!” he stumbled over his words. “Uh, how pleasant to see you here. Can I help you?” Byleth handed him the gloves, glowering. “Oh, thank you. I have been looking for these. How did you know they were mine?”

“You were wearing them earlier. You should keep better track of your stuff.”

Dimitri’s eyes widened and he took a step back. “Oh, I’m so sorry Professor, my deepest apologies.”

Byleth sighed. She was tired and her back muscles were sore, but she shouldn’t take out her irritation on her students. Especially not poor Dimitri, he was always so helpful. “No, no, I’m sorry Dimitri. I didn’t mean it like that.”

Dimitri looked at her for a moment, and then stepped further aside, motioning into the room. “I have some tea here, would you like to come in and sit and relax for a bit?” he asked. Byleth considered for a moment - although she didn’t particularly want to sit, having some tea sounded nice. She nodded.

Dimitri busily fumbled around setting a chair up for her and pouring the tea. She noticed he was more clumsy than she had expected - he had shown a lot of skill on the training grounds, yet seemed to be out of sorts here. She put her hand on his, as it was shaking trying to pour the tea. “That’s enough Dimitri, thank you.” Dimitri’s stared at her hand as he plopped into his seat. “I know you are nervous because I am an authority figure, but I would like if we could become friends.” Dimitri looked up at her and opened and closed his mouth a few times and his face was turning red again. “Are you certain you’re feeling ok? I’ve noticed that your face is flushed once again.”

“Uh, no… no, ” he mumbled, looking back down at his own hands now. “You can stop worrying about me. I AM nervous, I won’t deny that. But it’s uh... it’s fine. That’s just how I am.”

“Oh I see,” Byleth said. People did have different complexions, she supposed. She sipped the tea and tried to relax. The tea was warm and the chair was comfortable, but the muscles in her neck were so tight. She put her hand on the back of her neck and rolled her head slightly, trying to stretch out.

Dimitri spoke then, “Forgive me Professor, but is your neck bothering you?”

“Yes, I’m afraid that I was completely unprepared for how much paperwork would be involved with this position. I feel like I’ve been staring down at my desk all day. My neck and shoulders are a bit tight.” She tried pulling her shoulders back, and rolling them each separately.

Dimitri nodded, “Yes, I’m very familiar with the pain of too much paperwork - one of the downsides to being in the royal family, I suppose. My father used to complain bitterly about it.” He considered her for a moment. “Professor, may I try something?”

Byleth shrugged, “Sure.”

Dimitri stood and walked around behind her chair. He slowly put his hands on her shoulders and rubbed gently. “Pardon my touch. Dedue sometimes does this for me when my muscles are particularly tight, and I find it quite helps.”

“Oh thank you Dimitri! I am familiar with this type of massage. After a long battle, the mercenaries I fought alongside would do things like this as well. And more - whatever helps relieve the tension, you know?” Byleth smiled slightly at the memory.

Dimitri paused for a moment, but he was behind her, so she couldn’t see what he was doing. “And more?” he whispered finally.

“Oh yes, please proceed. That felt nice, you can go harder,” she said, pushing her shoulders back to him.

Dimitri stammered for a moment and began the massage again, pushing more firmly this time. His thumbs pressed into the muscles along the top of her shoulders and she groaned in pleasure. “Oh yes Dimitri, right there. That feels sooo good.”

Dimitri suddenly stopped again. Byleth looked back at him, and his face was frightfully scarlet and he was staring at her with wide eyes, his body frozen. “Uh…. pro,pro,professor, I’m sorry I think maybe you were right, I’m not feeling well. I’m sorry.”

“I understand,” Byleth stood to leave, she really shouldn’t have kept him up so late. “Please visit Manuela if this continues to bother you. I will check in on you tomorrow then?”

Dimitri turned away slightly and nodded.

  
******  
LadiesMan69 made a new group "BL-lild-hookupsquad"

LadiesMan69 added BlueLions - Dimitri

LadiesMan69: just wnt by lild’s room and u guys…. I saw prof leavng! And lild was so frekn red

PureBoi: ...is lild Dimitri?

GentleGiant: Please refrain from calling His Highness lild...

MemeTimeHasArrived: OMG. it’s dark out!! Wats she doing so late?

DelicateFlwrPwr: woaaahhh she movn fast!!

StormKitten: huh??

KnightSquadRiseUp: dima has a crush on professor

TastyTreat: well yes, everyone knows that

StormKitten: what! I didn’t know that

PureBoi: i didn’t know that either :(

AngryDeathCannon: why am i in this grp?

MemeTimeHasArrived: also saw Marianne leave Felix’s room earlier… there were weird noises

LadiesMan69: !!!!

LadiesMan69: WHAT! Wat kinda noises

DelicateFlwrPwr: u better leave Marianne the fuck alone

MemeTimeHasArrived: like … weird. Squeky? Hi pitched? I dunno

URWeak:... i am IN the group, were you aware? Mind ur own fuckin business

KnightSquadRiseUp: uh….

LadiesMan69 has kicked URWeak and Marianne from the group

MemeTimeHasArrived: keep yer cool man. This is Marianne wr talkn bout

GentleGiant: I hope that you are not intending on interfering with His Highness’ crush

KnightSquadRiseUp: why u thnk he’ll confess on his own? U want him to be happy right?

GentleGiant: of course

LadiesMan69: shld i go talk to felix?

DelicateFlwrPwr: u literally just kicked him lol

LadiesMan69: im gnna talk to him

StormKitten: how would we help dimitri?

PureBoi: I'd like to help if I can

TastyTreat: perhaps with encouragement he would be able to talk to her?

KnightSquadRiseUp: no

MemeTimeHasArrived: no

GentleGiant: no

LadiesMan69: Felix won’t opn teh door.

LadiesMan69 added URWeak to the group.

URWeak: fuck off

URWeak has left the group


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> KnightSquadRiseUp = Ingrid  
LadiesMan69 = Sylvain  
URWeak = Felix  
GentleGiant = Dedue  
TastyTreat = Mercedes  
PureBoi = Ashe  
StormKitten = Annette  
MemeTimeHasArrived = Claude  
DelicateFlwrPwr = Hilda  
AngryDeathCannon = Lysithea  
Marianne = Marianne

Byleth had been in the library for 2 hours already and she hadn’t learned anything yet. She ruffled through the books on the table in front of her and sighed in irritation. Where was the librarian when she needed him?

“Excuse me Professor? You look… frustrated. Is there anything I can help with?” She looked up to meet Ashe’s inquisitive face. He was holding a large book with a picture of a cavalier on the front.

“Hello there Ashe. Actually, maybe I could use your help. Are you familiar with the books in this library?” she asked.

Ashe nodded excitedly. “Oh yes. I really enjoy reading. I certainly don’t know all of the books here, but I should be able to help you find whatever you’re looking for.”

“Very well. I’m trying to find out more about chasing skirts, but I’m having no luck at all.” Byleth said.

Ashe dropped the book onto the floor and it landed with a heavy thunk, narrowly missing his foot. His mouth popped open. “S...s...sk…. skirts? You want to… chase skirts?” he fumbled.

Byleth put her chin on her hand and leaned forward. “You know, like Sylvain?” she prompted.

Ashe scurried to pick up his book, and he wouldn’t meet her eyes. “Um….I’m sorry Professor. I don’t think I can help you with that. Maybe … um… maybe Sylvain has some tips.”

Byleth nodded. “Of course. I should go directly to the source. Thank you Ashe.” Ashe nodded and ran off, tripping over his own feet in his haste. Had she said something to upset him? He seemed very anxious to get away.

She sighed and put away the unhelpful books. She then began the walk to the stables - it was mid-afternoon, and she had assigned Felix and Sylvain to stable duty there. As she strolled along the path, she found her mind drifting to the other evening with Dimitri. She had enjoyed having tea with him quite a bit; she had thought of it often in the last few days. During class, her eyes often drifted to Dimitri, and he was always so attentive. His blue eyes were always watching her.

Perhaps tea time was a good experience to improve relationships between people? If she could improve her bond with the other students, they would make a more effective team in combat. She would have to try it with some other students. She entered the stables, curious to see how Felix and Sylvain were doing. This was supposed to be a time for them to work through their differences, but Felix’s face was red and he was stomping around, and Sylvain was staring at him with his hands on his hips.

“Felix! I’m your closest friend, for goodness sake. You have to tell me!” he said.

“Go to hell, it’s none of your business,” Felix snarled.

“Ahem! Excuse my interruption,” Byleth said and both boys jumped and turned to her in surprise. “I hope that you two can get along.”

“We’re fine,” Felix said.

“Yeah, just great,” Sylvain confirmed.

They didn’t look it, but Byleth had never been very good at reading people. “Ok then. Sylvain, I was wondering if you would like to join me for tea tomorrow? I have some things I’d like to discuss with you.”

The frown on Sylvain’s face disappeared and he put one hand on the back of his neck. “Wow Professor, I never expected you to make a move like that. I’d be delighted to join such a beautiful lady! I’m sure we’ll have a great time,” he smiled at her.

“Right. Very good,” she turned to Felix, who was glaring at her. “How is your special training going Felix?” she asked.

Felix’s eyes widened and he turned his head away. “It’s fine. Worthless. Waste of time. But, whatever.”

Sylvain was watching him. “What special training?” he asked Byleth.

“I said, it’s none of your business!” Felix snapped.

“I don’t see any reason to hide it. I’m hoping it will come in handy at our next battle,” Byleth said, as Felix sighed and turned his back. He was holding a broom in one hand, and she could see that he was gripping it so hard that his knuckles were turning white. “Felix shows great promise with the sword, but he’s very aggressive and lacks battlefield awareness,” Byleth explained. “So I came up with a plan to combat this. It also allows him to spend time with animals, which I know he enjoys so much.”

Felix spun back around, and shouted, “I told you! I don’t even like animals!”

Byleth tilted her head. “I’m not sure why you’re so insistent on that. Marianne said you’ve been doing a very good job.”

Felix snorted. “As if Marianne would ever say someone was not doing a good job. Besides, I’m not going to go into something half-hearted like some fools,” he side-eyed Sylvain at that, “but that doesn’t mean I LIKE it.”

“What exactly are we talking about here?” Sylvain asked, leaning forward, an excited look on his face.

“A hawk,” Byleth replied.

“Wh..what? A hawk?” Sylvain took a step back and looked confused.

“Marianne found her. She can like, understand birds or something,” Felix interrupted. “It’s a red-tailed hawk. Her wing is damaged, so she can fly but not well enough to survive in the wild.”

Byleth smiled. Felix was already showing so much interest in this, it was obvious her intuition had been right. Felix was a very skilled swordsman, and Byleth was certain that with falconeering training, he would become an unmatched force on the battlefield. Byleth had fought alongside a falconeer before and had been extremely impressed with the experience.

Sylvain had his hand on his chest and he had started to giggle uncontrollably. “Oh. my. God. Felix…. A hawk… no way….”

Felix spun the broom in his hand and swept Sylvain’s legs out from under him. He landed with a thud onto the ground on his back. But he didn’t stop laughing, he just held his stomach with his arm and rolled into a ball. Felix glowered over him. “Shut up!” he yelled.

******  
**_"BL-lild-hookupsquad"_**

LadiesMan69 added URWeak and Marianne to the group

LadiesMan69 changed URWeak to HawkBlade

LaidesMan69: …. Guys… i have big news

HawkBlade: wtf Sylvain, change my name back

PureBoi: why is that your name? It sounds so cool

HawkBlade: ….

Marianne: what a lovely name!

DelicateFlwrPwr: totes Marianne!

HawkBlade: ...fine...

KnightSquadRiseUp: what news?

LadiesMan69: nvrmnd, Felix has a swrd to my throat. Avenge me

PureBoi: uhmmm guys…. I have big news too. I think we may have a problem

TastyTreat: Oh no, what’s wrong Ashe?

GentleGiant: I will assist you if I can

PureBoi: I think the professor likes girls

MemeTimeHasArrived: ohhh rlly?

LadiesMan69: no way

StormKitten: Why u say that?

PureBoi: she wanted to know how to chase skirts :(

DelicateFlwrPwr: omg

KnightSquadRiseUp: poor lild

PureBoi: i told her to ask sylvain for tips

HawkBlade: why the hell would u do that, he’s an idiot

LadiesMan69: !! she havn tea with me tomorrow !!

GentleGiant: oh no, His Highness will be crushed

MemeTimeHasArrived: hmm i dunno, i saw sparks between them. Theres no way nthng there

TastyTreat: I agree with Claude. The Professor is hard to read, but still

KnightSquadRiseUp: maybe she likes both

DelicateFlwrPwr: we need to test

MemeTimeHasArrived: i like where this is going

TastyTreat: how??

DelicateFlwrPwr: u thnkin wat im thnkin?

StormKitten: should we just ask her?

MemeTimeHasArrived: no way, leave it to us ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

KnightSquadRiseUp: ...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just think Felix would look really cool with a hawk, no other reason lol


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> KnightSquadRiseUp = Ingrid  
LadiesMan69 = Sylvain  
HawkBlade = Felix  
GentleGiant = Dedue  
TastyTreat = Mercedes  
PureBoi = Ashe  
StormKitten = Annette  
MemeTimeHasArrived = Claude  
DelicateFlwrPwr = Hilda  
AngryDeathCannon = Lysithea  
Marianne = Marianne  
LadyE = Edelgard  
L4Loser = Lorenz  
GetTehUnderstanding = Petra  
PrinceLY = Dimitri  
GothicDoom = Hubert  
ShonenPunch = Caspar  
BigArmsLittleShirt = Raphael  
FBoiBetterThanYou = Ferdinand

"Hey kid, are you all settled in?" Jeralt asked. Byleth had stopped to visit Jeralt in his office after leaving the stables.

Byleth shook her head and sighed, "Not quite. I've encountered many difficulties."

"Oh?" Jeralt patted her on the arm, "Don't be so hard on yourself. You've pretty much been a mercenary your whole life, it's no wonder such a drastic change would throw you for a loop. I don't know what Rhea was thinking." Jeralt walked to his desk and motioned Byleth to the chair. "Let's see if we can figure this out together. What are your biggest challenges?"

She pulled out her journal and handed it to Jeralt so he could look over her notes. "I never know what to say. And the students' reactions are often… unexpected. It's like they just don't get me," Byleth complained.

"Ok, stop trying to think like a professor; think like a mercenary. What specific skills need improvement?" Jeralt prompted.

"Ally support. Lecture content. Communication." Byleth counted off the 3 biggest obstacles on her fingers.

Jeralt pointed to the journal and she wrote them down. "Solutions?" He asked.

Byleth considered carefully, "For ally support, I think sharing tea is good. I've had tea with Dimitri a few times now and we seem much closer."

Jeralt raised an eyebrow. "Oh really? Dimitri huh." He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "I'm sorry kid, I never really taught you this stuff. Why don't you take him out for dinner? Your mother and I used to go to town every week for a nice meal out. Gifts too: flowers, chocolate... stuff like that lets the person know that you care about them. Your mom used to love getting crap like that.”

"Dinner and flowers?" Byleth mentally facepalmed, remembering Sylvain’s invitation her first day. Obviously he had been trying to help her improve her relationship skills and she hadn't even realized it. This professor stuff was more nuanced than it seemed.

“Ok, I'll give it a try. Moving on, the next thing is lecture content. I've been doing research in the library and I have lots of battle experience to pull from. But as soon as I'm in front of the class, it all slips my mind."

Jeralt grinned. "I know the perfect solution for that. You need to go fishing."

"Huh? Fishing?" Byleth asked in confusion.

"You're filling your head with all these words and new things but you aren't giving yourself time to process it. Take a break. Fish for a few hours every morning before lectures and just think about what you want to say and how you're going to say it."

Byleth thought for a moment and nodded. "You're right. I've been preparing for the wrong thing. I already know what to teach, just not HOW to teach it."

Jeralt stood up and walked to the corner to get his fishing pole. "Here kid, use this. If you catch some nice ones, you can even cook 'em afterwards."

"Oh! Then I can make dinner to share!" Byleth said, her lips turning up just slightly, almost a smile. If she caught enough fish, she should be able to fit in several meals each day with several different students. That would definitely be a good bonding experience.

"Right. I bet Dimitri would like that a whole lot," Jeralt said with a smirk. "As for the last one… communication huh. I'm not too great at that either. Maybe just listen to what your students have to say? Let them carry most of the conversation? I don't think you're ever going to be a big talker."

Byleth nodded. "Thanks Dad, this has been very helpful." She put one of her hands into a fist and pumped it by her side in satisfaction.

"Dad?" Jeralt tipped his head and smiled. "Hey maybe this school is a good influence after all."

******

** _"GarregMach_AllStudents"_ **

LadyE: Excuse me, but I would like to know why one of the students has a pet eagle??

PrinceLY: Good afternn Wdeldfard. That was prof’s idea

PrinceLY: Edelbart*

PrinceLY: Edfwlgard*

PrinceLY: ughhh phone 2 smakll

LadyE: …this is unacceptable

GentleGiant: My apologies, His Highness has broken his phone again. you will have to go through me

GothicDoom: Lady Edelgard does not need to go through anyone, I will remove all who stand in her way. Permanently.

LadyE: It's fine H

KnightSquadRiseUp: Someone has an eagle? what?

Marianne: ...um

Marianne: ….

ShonenPunch: Spit it out already

DelicateFlwrPwr: Watch it Caspar, I have an axe and I know how to use it

ShonenPunch: bring it on!!

MemeTimeHasArrived: she means it, I've seen her kill 4 less

LadyE: unbelievable. He isn’t even IN the BLACK EAGLES. If anyone should have an eagle, it should be someone in our house.

HawkBlade: look, I didn't ask for this. mind your own business

Marianne: … she's actually a hawk not an eagle. Sorry…

DelicateFlwrPwr: don't apologz sweety, they r just dumb

MemeTimeHasArrived: leadr of black eagles doesn’t know what an eagle looks like ;p

GothicDoom: did you just call Lady Edelgard dumb? I will end you

MemeTimeHasArrived: oooh, scary

LadyE: It's fine H

L4Loser: I believe it is against the rules to keep pets.

L4Loser: Also, can someone please tell me how to change my name back?

AngryDeathCannon: hahahaha

LadyE: Exactly. No one is allowed to have a pet!

MemeTimeHasArrived: that's it, I'm getting a deer.

PureBoi: really? wow that's so cool!

KnightSquadRiseUp: I want a dog!

TastyTreat: no not really Ashe

PureBoi: aww :(

BigArmLittleShirt: we raisn hawks for dinnr? Do they taste like chckn?

Marianne: o no! nono

HawkBlade: WTF! Pookie is not a PET and she’s not for EATING

GetTehUnderstanding: what is pookie?

LadiesMan69: OMG

Ladiesman69: OMFG

KnightSquadRiseUp: wat

HawkBlade: … shut up

Ladiesman69: you namd it pookie?

PureBoi: sorry I’m lost. Named what?

HawkBlade: wtf is wrong with that? Its her name

Ladiesman69: roftlmao….can't breathe…. dying….

Marianne: ...I like it…

DelicateFlwrPwr: damn straight, its perfect. stfu.

DelicateFlwrPwr: also wat r we talking about here?

StormKitten: I am superrrrrrr duper confused

GetTehUnderstanding: I too am lacking understanding

KnightSquadRiseUp: np Petra, everyone is lacking understanding right now

GentleGiant: His Highness says 'Felix is training with a hawk in falconry skills in order to be more effective in combat'

DelicateFlwrPwr: hahalol that's so dumb!

GentleGiant: Apparently he is named Pookie. Marianne has been helping

Marianne: *she…

DelicateFlwrPwr: I was wrong, that's totes awesome

MemeTimeHasArrived: no f'n way

PureBoi: is that real?

TastyTreat: i think this time it's true Ashe

ShonenPunch: that's so cool!! I want a hawk! Not fair!!

AngryDeathCannon: waah waah baby face go cry to yer leadr. Oh wait she cryin 2

GothicDoom: your death will come when you least expect it child.

KnightSquadRiseUp: creepy

AngryDeathCannon: Child?? I can roast you alive from across the hall b4 u even reach me, wannabe vampire

GothicDoom: you won’t even see it coming fool

DelicateFlwrPwr: wowz, even creeper

LadyE: I am submitting a formal complaint

MemeTimeHasArrived: lol

HawkBlade: do what u want. Prof got approval from Seteth

LadyE: :(

FBoiBetterThanYou: I know you are jealous Edelgard, but let us not be cruel. If Felix is unable to learn the skills to ride a horse, then I see nothing wrong with giving him another option.

MemeTimeHasArrived: double burn! respect F boi

LadyE: !! I am not jealous!!

GothicDoom: I shall add Seteth and Ferdinand to the death list as well then

GetTeHUnderstanding: sorry what is this list of death?

HawkBlade: fuck you, i can ride a horse. I just don’t want to

FBoiBetterThanYou: Tell yourself that if that helps you sleep at night

HawkBlade: can you back that big talk up? spar me and we’ll see just who is lacking skill

PureBoi: I feel we’ve all passed by something important. Felix has a hawk. A battle hawk.

PureBoi: That is seriously the coolest thing I've ever heard. Felix is so amazing, like a hero of legend!

Ladiesman69: ….

HawkBlade: …. Uh… no

KnightsSquadRiseUp: never thought I would hear that sentence in a million lifetimes, but ok

TastyTreat: aw, that’s so sweet Ashe

StormKitten: isn't it? So neat, I want to meet pookie

PureBoi: oh me too!!

HawkBlade: … I guess. if you really want

Ladiesman69: me too!!!!!

HawkBlade: NO, not u

_ **"BL-lild-hookupsquad"** _

KnightSquadRiseUp: class is starting u guys, hurry it up

MemeTimeHasArrived: ok gf, time to put our plan into action

DelicateFlwrPwr: u know it

******

Byleth tidied up the papers on her desk. She thought the lecture had gone pretty well today - maybe the fishing was beneficial after all! Dimitri shuffled up to the desk and smiled at her. "Professor, is there anything I can do to help?" He had been staying late after class the last few days to assist with cleaning up the room.

He was so considerate, really such a sweet boy, and she enjoyed spending time with him. She even found herself intentionally leaving small messes so that she had an excuse to keep him later.

"Sure, I would appreciate that Dimitri," she said. Dimitri's eyes crinkled as his smile widened. His eyes were a clear crystal blue, like the sky on a summer day. The corners of her mouth turned up as she felt a weird flutter in her chest, almost a thump. Her face felt warm. Woah, what was *that*?! She blinked a few times at the new sensation.

"Professor. Could you make that expression again?" Dimitri asked, taking a step closer, his cheeks flushed with that familiar pink. He was awfully close to her, she thought, and licked her lips nervously. His shoulders were broad, the cloth of his uniform stretched tight. He was a strong fighter and she wondered idly what his muscles looked like under his shirt. If she reached out her hand she could almost touch his chest.

"Hey Teach, gotta minute?" Byleth jumped a little at the sudden voice at her side. She turned to see Claude and Hilda. Claude was grinning and leaning casually on the edge of her desk and Hilda was twirling the end of her hair around her pinky, looking bored. Dimitri stepped back from her and Byleth felt as though the pressure in the room dropped a bit in his absence.

"Certainly Claude, Hilda. Are you having difficulties with your studies?" Byleth asked.

"Nah, that's all fine. I was just wondering if you wanted to share some tea with me later? Get to know each other a little better, you know," he leaned in and winked.

"Do you have something in your eye?" Byleth asked.

Hilda giggled. "Nah, winking is just.. like a friendly little signal. Claude does it a lot because he's an idiot. You don't want to have tea with a big, dumb brute like him. You'd much rather have tea with a beautiful delicate flower, like me, isn't that right Professor?" Hilda stepped forward and wrapped her arm around Byleth's.

Byleth definitely hadn't expected her students to take the initiative like this. Especially not Hilda, she never took the initiative with anything. Byleth was impressed. "You two want to improve your relationship with me? I'm very pleased you asked me. I'm already having tea with Sylvain today, so why don't we share a meal together later instead? I have a nice trout I caught this morning that I could cook up for us?"

"Food you cooked yourself with love? How could I turn that down!?" Claude asked. "Are you sure you want to have both of us there though? It'll be a lot more fun with just me you know," He winked again.

Byleth heard a snap behind her and she turned. Dimitri was standing with a broken quill in his hand. His was staring at Claude and it looked like he was clenching his teeth. "I'm sorry to keep you so long Dimitri, you can go ahead if you'd like," she said, handing him a new quill from her desk. He must be getting impatient, she was sure he had more important things to do than help his professor clean.

"No, no it's fine," he said firmly.

"Anyways, I'd like to get much closer to you both," Byleth said. If she had to raise her support with each student individually this would take forever. The more the merrier, she figured. "Let's do this together - we can have a lot more fun with three of us than just two, don't you think?" She decided to try out the new friendly signal Hilda had told her about, and winked.

She heard another snap - Dimitri had broken the quill she had just given him! Claude's arm slipped off the desk and he tripped forward, and Hilda was staring at her with her mouth wide open. Had Byleth said something wrong again? She thought back over her words… she didn't see anything wrong.

"W... wow. Uh, you've given me a lot to think about. Uh…" Claude stumbled. "I guess we'll see you later then," he said and grabbed Hilda's arm and dragged her out of the room.

  
*****

_ **"BL-lild-hookupsquad"** _

DelicateFlwrPwr: holy fuck, Prof is a freaky freak

MemeTimeHasArrived: was NOT expctng that. Ngl, im shook

Ladiesman69: huh?

KnightSquadRiseUp: what happened?

MemeTimeHasArrived: our plan was to both ask her out n see which she picked

DelicateFlwrPwr: 2 see which she prefers, girls or guys

HawkBlade: unbelievable. That was your great plan? Idiots

MemeTimeHasArrived: ya well she wants us both. At the same time

TastyTreat: oh dear, maybe there was a misunderstanding?

MemeTimeHasArrived: she*literally* said it will be more fun with 3

LadiesMan69: holy sht

PureBoi: what does that mean?

StormKitten: nothing Ashe

GentleGiant: what did u do to His Highness? He is in a most foul mood

KnightSquadRiseUp: was he there???

DelicateFlwrPwr: ya

HawkBlade: idiots

Ladiesman69: oohh, he's jelly

MemeTimeHasArrived: I have a new plan


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, short chapter this time...
> 
> KnightSquadRiseUp = Ingrid  
LadiesMan69 = Sylvain  
HawkBlade = Felix  
GentleGiant = Dedue  
TastyTreat = Mercedes  
StormKitten = Annette  
MemeTimeHasArrived = Claude  
DelicateFlwrPwr = Hilda

“Hi Professor, thanks for inviting me!” Sylvain said as he straddled the seat across from Byleth. She passed him a small cup of tea. Sylvain took a small sip and then he sniffed the cup. “Oh hey, is this Almyran Pine Needle? That’s Felix’s favorite you know.”

“Really? That’s right, I remember Ingrid saying you four grew up together,” Byleth took out her journal and wrote _Felix likes Almyran Pine Needle Tea_.

“Sure did, we’ve been friends forever. I wouldn’t be much of a friend if I didn’t know his favorite tea, now would I?” Sylvain asked, sipping the tea. He was leaning in the chair, one leg crossed over the other, the chair tilted backwards slightly.

This was a great opportunity for Byleth to learn more about Dimitri. And the other students. Not just DImitri of course, no way. “That’s perfect then. Can you please tell me Dimitri and Ingrid’s favorite tea as well? I’d like to be a good host.”

Sylvain was silent for a moment, chewing his bottom lip in thought. “Huh. I guess I don’t actually know their favorite teas.”

“Only Felix’s then?” Byleth asked, slightly disappointed.

Sylvain looked away and his cheeks had blushed pink. “Uh, yeah. Sorry Professor.” He took a small pastry from the tray and they sat quietly for a few minutes. “So you said you wanted to discuss something with me?” Sylvain asked, looking back at her.

Byleth added a little honey to the tea - it was a bit too astringent for her tastes. She stirred it with a small silver spoon. “Yes. I’ve been trying to do some research on a particular matter, but I’ve had no luck at all. Ashe suggested that I speak with you directly. It’s about skirt chasing.”

Sylvain choked on his pastry and coughed a few times. He gulped down some tea, but it was too hot, and he spluttered. Byleth waited patiently for him to get under control. “You really want to do this Professor? Am I understanding this right?” Sylvain asked, with a strange look on his face.

Byleth twisted her lips. She wasn’t particularly interested in being a dancer herself, but she did want to be a better teacher and help her students with their interests. If Sylvain wanted to be a dancer, she would have to learn it herself as well. “I do. Well, I should say that I’d like to learn so that I can help you become better at it.”

Sylvain’s eyes widened. “Are you saying that I’m bad at it?”

Byleth shook her head, “No no, I’m sure you’re fine. But it is my job as a Professor to help you improve even more. This is a special type of dance - it’s power should not be underestimated.”

Sylvain shifted uncomfortably in his chair. “That’s a funny way to say it. Professor. Can I call you Byleth?” Byleth nodded. “Ok, Byleth. I don’t think you need to be worried about this particular skill. It’s not something professors usually worry about. I don’t need your help, flattered though I am.”

Byleth frowned. “Nonsense. This type of combat is very important too,” she tapped her finger on the table thoughtfully. “What about dancing lessons?” she asked. “I understand footwork, grace, and charm are all important attributes. Perhaps we could practice together.”

“Uh… I’ve never heard it called a type of combat before, although I guess it is a different kind of fight. I mean, I guess dancing lessons might be beneficial? But I’ve had plenty of dancing lessons growing up. If *you* really want to learn though, I’d be happy to help.”

Byleth nodded and added some more notes to her journal. She’d have to fit the lessons into her already busy schedule.

Sylvain suddenly leaned forward with a big smile. “Hold up Professor! Er, Byleth, I’ve just had a great idea! If we’re going to have dance lessons, we should invite some others! We just happen to have someone in our class that has received dance lessons their entire life.”

“Who?” Byleth asked, her quill poised to write more in the journal.

Sylvain’s eyes were twinkling. “Dimitri. As future king, he’s received all kinds of lessons, including dancing. He could definitely help us out”

Dimitri? Dancing? An image of him in a dress uniform waltzing around a ballroom floor flashed into her mind and she felt her breath catch in her throat. She put one of her hands on her chin, worried Sylvain might notice the change in her demeanor.

“Uhm, that would give us an odd number of people for pairing up though,” she said softly.

One corner of Sylvain’s mouth twisted up into a lopsided grin. “Yeah we need to invite one other person. I wonder who we should invite ... someone that needs intricate footwork for their fighting style would be best. Hmm….” he put his hand out, palm up, expectantly.

Byleth thought for a moment, and it came to her. “Felix.” she said, nodding and writing down the name in her journal.

Sylvain leaned back in his chair and put his hands behind his head. “That is a fantastic idea Professor. Truly, your intellect is dizzying. This is going to be great.”

  
******

  
_**"BL-lild-hookupsquad"**_

MemeTimeHasArrived: well taht was disappntg

KnightSquadRiseUp: ur 3sum didn’t go as planned? *eyerollemoji

DelicateFlwrPwr: it was srsly just dinner. Lame

MemeTimeHasArrived: time to roll out the new plan

HawkBlade: is this one idiotic too?

MemeTimeHasArrived: gf and i r gonna flirt like crazy w/her

DelicateFlwrPwr: if lild gets jelly enough, he will act

HawkBlade: so yes, still idiotic

KnightSquadRiseUp: he might kill u. Not that i care, just like an fyi

GentleGiant: I am vehemently opposed to this plan. Do not antagonize His Highness!

MemeTimeHasArrived: its for his own good Dedude. He needs a little push if we want him to be happy. U DO want him to be happy rght?

GentleGiant: :(

LadiesMan69: i have a plan also, alrdy started

HawkBlade: oh great. Double the idiocy. Count me out

MemeTimeHasArrived: wats ur plan?

LadiesMan69: dancing. she gonna have dance lessons, and I mnged to get her to invite lild 2!

TastyTreat: oh my goodness, that sounds wonderful!

MemeTimeHasArrived: A+ wtg

KnightSquadRiseUp: how the f did u manage that? Usually ur plans are super dumb

LadiesMan69: hey!

HawkBlade: im impressed, that is actually not bad

LadiesMan69: im glad to hear u say that fe, cause um… i need ur help

HawkBlade: no

LadiesMan69: pls!! This plan relies on u! We need another person to make pairs. You!

StormKitten: aww, I’d like to go dancing

HawkBlade: invite annie instead then, no way am i going

LadiesMan69: nooo, she wants u. And it will improve ur footwork for fighting

TastyTreat: i’ll take you dancing if u want annie

StormKitten: yay!!

LadiesMan69: pls fe. For dima. For me? Plssssssss

HawkBlade: ughhhh fine

MemeTimeHasArrived: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

HawkBlade: STFU

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was thinking of maybe bumping up the rating in the future for the romance stuff, but i've never written that before. Or i could make it a separate work? i dunno, let me know what you think.
> 
> As always, love kudos/comments :)


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> KnightSquadRiseUp = Ingrid  
LadiesMan69 = Sylvain  
HawkBlade = Felix  
GentleGiant = Dedue  
TastyTreat = Mercedes  
PureBoi = Ashe  
StormKitten = Annette  
MemeTimeHasArrived = Claude  
DelicateFlwrPwr = Hilda  
AngryDeathCannon = Lysithea  
LadyE = Edelgard  
PrinceLY = Dimitri  
GothicDoom = Hubert  
ShonenPunch = Caspar

"Is this for me? Thank you," Ingrid said, taking the yellow flower from Byleth and smiling. Byleth had gone to the greenhouse earlier and had picked an armful of random blooms. She didn’t know what they were, nor did she particularly care - she had never been fond of flowers, except for those few that could be eaten or used for medicinal purposes. What exactly was the point of cutting off part of a plant and then spending the next few days watching it slowly wither away and die? But her students seemed to light up when given flowers, and they became more motivated in class. Scavenging through weeds was a small price to pay for such a large benefit.

"You're welcome," Byleth said. She noticed Ingrid was holding a crumpled piece of paper with her other hand. She pointed and asked, "What's that?"

Ingrid pulled her hand back quickly behind her back, as though trying to hide the paper, even though Byleth had clearly already seen it. "Oh, that's nothing Professor!" she squeaked.

Byleth frowned. Was Ingrid working on homework? They way the paper was crumpled, it obviously wasn't going well. "Let's see it then. If you are having trouble with your studies, don't struggle needlessly, I can provide assistance."

Ingrid turned away. "No, no that's not it at all Professor. To be honest, it's a letter from my father. He's checking up on me."

Byleth nodded sagely, "Oh yes, my father checks on me constantly as well. It is nice to have someone concerned for your safety, isn’t it?"

Ingrid shook her head and sighed, "It's about marriage - he wants me to find a partner as soon as possible. He keeps sending me possible options, but I don't even know them! I'd like to marry someone special, someone close to me." Ingrid stopped, and stood silently looking at Byleth. Was she looking for some kind of assistance here? Byleth had no idea what to say.

Then she suddenly remembered the ring sitting on her desk, back in her own room. Jeralt had given it to her a few days after their last meeting, and he had smiled warmly, saying, "I know how close you've become to some of your students. Well one in particular. Anyways, I think it's time to give you this." Byleth had taken it wordlessly and bewildered - she had never contemplated marriage before.

Ingrid was still just standing there, chewing on her lip and twisting her hands together… was Ingrid really proposing to her? She hadn't even realized that Ingrid felt that way! Obviously Jeralt had seen signs that Byleth missed - he was always so observant. Byleth didn't feel anything special towards Ingrid, but she had never experienced romantic love before. What did it feel like? She would have to do some research on the matter before she could respond. "Oh... Ingrid, I didn't know you felt that way," was all she could think to say.

"I don't think it's that strange, is it? Wanting to marry someone that you actually have feelings for? However, my father is worried about money. You see, due to some circumstances, my family is not well off. Actually, you could say that we're quite poor," Ingrid looked at the ground and shuffled her feet.

“I'm a commoner. I don't have a lot of money," Byleth said.

Ingrid stammered, "Oh, I'm sorry Professor. I'm sure there are a lot of people that have had it as bad as me, and surely even worse. I wasn't complaining. It's just that I've always wanted to be a knight, and my father doesn't understand. He thinks marriage will solve all of our Family's problems."

Ah, so money was not the biggest issue. Rather it was Ingrid's desire not to give up her dream of becoming a knight, just to become a housewife. Sitting around the house, far from battle, was unimaginable to Byleth and she could certainly understand why Ingrid would feel the same. Ingrid was a strong fighter and a highly valued ally. Byleth wasn't necessarily *opposed* to marriage, especially if it would help Ingrid fulfill her dream. Perhaps it wouldn't be so bad. "So you are looking for someone who would allow you pursue becoming a knight while still being a wife, correct?"

Ingrid's eyes widened. "Professor, do you think that such a thing would be possible? I never considered doing both before. I wonder..." she trailed off, looking thoughtfully into the distance.

"I think you would make an excellent knight," Byleth said confidently. "As for doing both..." Byleth mulled it over, resting her chin on her hand. She didn't know much about knighthood and even less about the rules of the Kingdom. Was there some rule against being a knight and a wife at the same time? Actually, could women even become knights? Or more importantly, could two women marry each other? Byleth was suddenly ashamed at how little she knew about the laws and traditions of Faerghus. Perhaps she should speak to Dimitri, he was certain to know Kingdom rules. "Let me do some research and get back to you. I'm sorry I can't be more confident - I truly do appreciate you asking me, it was very brave. I just need to give it some thought, ok?"

"Err....ok?" Ingrid said, looking confused.

Byleth patted her on the arm. "I will definitely give you an answer soon."

  
******

_ **"GarregMach_AllStudents"** _

AngryDeathCannon: hahaha u guys got PWND

LadyE: That battle was ridiculous. A mockery.

MemeTimeHasArrived: makes sense. litrlly called a "mock" battle

PriceLY: You fought very well Edelgard, you have nothing to be ashamed of

LadyE: no matter, I've already put in a petition to have the results overturned.

HawkBlade: On what grounds? Your pathetic weakness?

GothicDoom: You may be strong during the day sword-boy, but you can't stay awake forever. I will come for you in the night

MemeTimeHasArrived: woahhh super kinky. can i watch?

LadiesMan69: Fe! I'll prtct u. i can sty ovr 4 as lng as u want

HawkBlade: I don't want. ever

AngryDeathCannon: haha Edelgard is mad cuz Felix and Dimitri wrecked her

PrinceLY: Edelgard, please do not take this so badly. Your house provided quite a challenge

PureBoi: that battle was fantastic. I've never seen anything like it.

AngryDeathCannon: haha BE got *destroyed*

LadeE: using a hawk is an advantage! You were able to discern our movements unfairly

DelicateFlwrPwr: don't talk shit bout Marianne’s hawk. u just suck

KnightSquadRiseUp: uh... i dunno if any1 noticed. but i have a pegasus...

DelicateFlwrPwr: srsly lrn 2 fly losers

LadyE: that is! different!

KnightSquadRiseUp: ... like its an entire horse. that flies. and i fly with it...

MemeTimeHasArrived: r u trying to say a wounded hawk is what gave us the overwhelming advantage here?

LadyE: ...

LadyE: I don't know but something did. U guys cheated.

GothicDoom: If Lady Edelgard says there is cheating, there was cheating. I will not stop until I have uncovered your fiendish trickery

TastyTreat: oh dear, I don't think we should be throwing around claims of cheating!

PrinceLY: Indeed, I do not appreciate such negative accusations against my comrades. I assure you, Felix has no need to cheat

LadyE: I've never seen someone's crest activate as much as Felix's

LaidesMan69: hey watch it. Don't start blaming crests, there's no control over that. wtf

HawKBlade: yeah. I'm just stronger than u

PureBoi: Felix *decimated* everything. I guess all that training he does really does work. so COOL! Amazing!

HawkBlade: ... uh, er…

StormKitten: smoked em

LadiesMan69: pretty hot, got 2 say!

LadyE: Dimitri critted every single time he struck!

GentleGiant: His Highness is very skilled. He does not require tricks

ShonenPunch: he broke a lance in half. by swinging it. how can i g et that strng?

DelicateFlwrPwr: u can't. ur like 3 feet tall.

ShonenPunch: u r short 2!!!

DelicateFlwrPwr: yes, i am delicate flower. 2 weak for this wrld. defend me

ShonenPunch: u cut ppl in half!!

DelicateFlwrPwr: but its so harrrddd

MemeTimeHasArrived: dont mess with Hilda, shes a frkng monstr

PrinceLY: Edelgard, I would be happy to face you in single hand-to-hand combat if you wish to assess my combat skills directly

GothicDoom: I will be happy to take my Lady’s place - anytime. I will destroy you

TastyTreat: not to change the subject from all this talk of fighting, but Dimitri, I'm so proud of your typing skills, you've really improved! Your new phone suits you

StormKitten: totlly. yer typing so good D!

PrinceLY: why thank you. I appreciate your kind words

KnightSquadRiseUp: uh...

PrinceLY: Ingrid. Please speak no further.

MemeTimeHasArrived: wat?

KnightSquadRiseUp: ...

LadiesMan69: lol Dedude is typing for Dimtri, hes tellng him waht to say afhsfdjehfk

KnightSquadRiseUp: ....srry

MemeTimeHasArrived: ahhahahah

LadyE: ok, now that is funny

HawkBlade: pathetic

******

  
_**"BL-lild-hookupsquad"**_

MemeTimeHasArrived: plan b ENGAGE

DelicateFlwrPwr: ayye cptn

HawkBlade: idiots

******

"Hey there Teach, that was a great lesson," Claude said at the end of class, leaning against her desk again.

"Why thank you Claude!" Byleth said. Her hard work was finally paying off, her skills were improving!

"The way that you teach makes so much sense. I can't get over how well you describe things. I guess having actual battle experience makes the lesson a lot more interesting, huh?" he asked.

Dimitri walked up and hovered next to Claude, clearing his throat. Claude glanced at him and grinned. He took a step towards her, leaning forward so that his head was only a foot away. "Say Teach, I reaallllly enjoyed our dinner the other night. It was so great to spend time with you, and get to know you soooo much better.” He winked.

"Oh, I'm glad you enjoyed it. I too... uh, enjoyed it," Byleth said, winking back, using the friendly signal Claude seemed to favor so much. She was not sure what else to say - growing up with mercenaries hadn't really prepared her for casual conversations and compliments.

Hilda suddenly appeared on Byleth's other side. "Oh ya, Professor, that was so great! And I just loooovvved the flowers you gave me! They're so pretty and they smell so good. They totally remind me of you!" she giggled.

"That's... good too?" Byleth said, wondering why everyone was suddenly crowded up around her. She was uneasy with so many people standing so close. Dimitri was staring intently, his gaze alternating between Claude and Hilda.

"I'd really like it if we could do it again - maybe just the two of us this time? How about tonight?" Claude asked, and he put his hand out, lightly brushing Byleth's arm.

“Claude.” Dimitri said, his voice low. He took a step towards Claude, and Claude made a funny squeaking sound in his throat.

Byleth realized Dimitri positively towered over them, had he always been this tall? She swallowed thickly. “I’m sorry Claude, perhaps another time.”

“Ok, hey yeah, I don’t have a death wish. See you guys later!” Claude said, grabbing Hilda’s arm and skirting past Dimitri on his way out.

Byleth turned to face Dimitri and greeted him, "Hello Dimitri." Dimitri’s dark gaze lightened and he smiled. Byleth noticed that the smile he gave her looked different than when he smiled at others - the skin around his eyes would crinkle and the tops of his cheeks would turn pink. Byleth wasn't sure why, but she definitely liked it.

"I wanted to give this to you," Dimitri said, pulling his hand from behind his back and offering her a single red rose. The petals were full and velvety looking, and she detected it's faint smell even at this distance. She blinked a few times, noticing that it had just come into bloom - it would last a few days if she put it in a vase in her room. Then she would see it several times a day, a reminder of Dimitri. Suddenly the desirability of receiving flowers became very clear, and she wondered why she hadn't understood it before. She took the rose and said softly, "Why thank you."

"Professor. That expression... I really like it," Dimitri said, stepping closer. His hand was still touching hers, with the rose held gently between them. "That's... the closest to a smile I've ever seen from you," he continued.

"Oh..." Byleth said. Silence fell between them and the air felt thick, like a foggy day. Dimitri's fingers were very warm against hers. Perhaps she was getting sick? She definitely didn't feel normal.

Dimitri stepped back, and looked at the ground. "Sorry Professor, I ... I should be going now.” He turned to leave.

Byleth found that she really didn't want him to leave just yet. "Wait! I wanted to ask you something," she said, reaching out, speaking without thinking. He turned back, his eyes shining. Her mind raced, trying to come up with something, *anything* to ask. "OH! Do you want to go dancing?"

Dimitri's eyes widened. "Uh... huh?" he stumbled.

"I’m going to try to teach Sylvain and Felix to dance," Byleth said.

Dimitri's face crumpled in confusion. "What? Why are you teaching them?"

"You didn’t know that Sylvain wanted to become a dancer?" Byleth asked, bewildered that Dimitri had missed something so obvious about his friend. He was usually fairly cognizant of his companions, so it surprised her greatly that she had picked up on this and he had not.

But if anything, Dimitri looked even more confused. "Wh….what? Er, I... huh?"

"Sylvain suggested that you might be able to help us? I would like very much if you could come to our lessons and assist me. I too would like to learn to dance" Byleth continued, trying to explain.

Dimitri's face flushed red and he smiled. "Oh, I see! Professor, I would be honored to teach you to dance. I look forward to it."

"Very good then," Byleth said, sighing in relief. Her mind was already imagining Dimitri standing next to her, holding her arm and waist, slowly twirling. He was very strong, she was sure he could pick her up and spin her around like nothing. She felt that strange thump in her chest again, and she put her hand up, trying to disguise the movement as an embarrassing wave goodbye. "See you... then," she finished awkwardly.

Dimitri gave a small bow and turned to leave. "Sylvain, huh? I'll have to thank him later...." she heard him say quietly, as he walked away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the really long delay on this chapter, I got wrapped up in Sylvix week. Next chapter will be sooner!  
Also Dimitri and Felix being ridiculously OP just comes from my own play experience. I've played Blue Lions on all 3 difficulties and I dunno if I got crazy rng luck or what but they were stupid strong


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> KnightSquadRiseUp = Ingrid  
LadiesMan69 = Sylvain  
HawkBlade = Felix  
GentleGiant = Dedue  
TastyTreat = Mercedes  
PureBoi = Ashe  
StormKitten = Annette  
MemeTimeHasArrived = Claude  
DelicateFlwrPwr = Hilda  
AngryDeathCannon = Lysithea  
PrinceLY = Dimitri

_ **“BlueLions”** _

KnightSquadRiseUp: So guys, prof is actualy rlly cool to talk to

PrinceLY: indeed, she is quite amazing

LadiesMan69: shes frkn hilarious is what she is

TastyTreat: she is very generous, I constantly see her giving gifts and sharing meals

PureBoi: i respect her a lot

HawkBlade: shes strong

HawkBlade: also an idiot

MemeTimeHasArrived: she is like… beyond our understanding

KnightSquadRiseUp: Felix! She's not an idiot, she helped me a lot with a personal problm

PrinceLY: I'm very glad you all can see how wonderful she is

LadiesMan69: ya sure. u rdy for dance class l8r Fe?

HawkBlade: fuck

PrinceLY: I am looking forward to it greatly!! By the way, Sylvain, you are the best friend one could ever ask for. I appreciate you so much

LadiesMan69: u owe me big time

******

The four lesson participants stood on the dance floor in a loose circle. Byleth sighed - they hadn't even started yet and the students were already arguing amongst themselves.

“I am NOT dancing with that fucking Boar!” Felix shouted, pointing at Dimitri.

“Please, Felix, control your anger. I will not ask you to dance with me if you do not wish it,” Dimitri said calmly.

Sylvain wedged his way in-between the two, his hands up. "All right, all right, let's all relax. The whole point here is for the Professor to learn to dance, right? So obviously she should dance with the most experienced person," and he gestured grandly to Dimitri.

Byleth certainly didn't mind the thought of dancing with Dimitri, but this was not about her pleasure - this was a job and she needed to make sure her students were learning to the best of their abilities. So despite the fluttering feeling in her stomach at the thought of dancing with Dimitri, Byleth held firm. "Actually the point here is to help *you* become a better dancer, Sylvain. Clearly you should be the one dancing with Dimitri. I will dance with Felix," she said.

Felix suddenly interrupted, "Wait. Why the hell would Sylvain need to become a better dancer?"

Sylvain nervously laughed and waved his hand, "Haha, never mind that Fe. Besides considering the height differences here, it makes a lot more sense for the Professor to dance with Dimitri than to dance with you."

"Don't 'never mind that' to me, Sylvain. I want to know what the hell is going on here," Felix snapped, crossing his arms on his chest.

Byleth chastised Sylvain, "You really shouldn't keep your combat goals a secret from your closest allies." She turned to Felix to explain, "Sylvain would like to become a dancer on the battlefield. He has been chasing the skirts for a long time, and I intend to see his efforts to fruition."

Felix's face went blank and then several different expressions flashed across it and a strange choking sound came from his throat. Byleth shook her head sadly, he was taking this very hard - it must be a great shock to him.

Felix suddenly twirled on his heel and began marching towards the door. "Fucking unbelievable. I'm in some kind of cursed nightmare. Idiots everywhere. I'm leaving," he was muttering angrily.

"Wait Fe!" Sylvain sprinted towards him and grabbed his arm.

Byleth spoke up. "Felix, I would appreciate your assistance in this matter. Regardless of your own goals, you should always support your friends and allies, if it is within your capability to do so. This is important to Sylvain." She knew Felix wasn't particularly the *supportive* type, but he needed to start accepting his comrade's differences.

Felix barked out a laugh. "You're so wrong I don't even know where to start. This is just a game to him, Professor. He has no interest in dancing."

Sylvain took a deep breath, his hand rubbing the back of his neck nervously. "Actually Fe, I was really looking forward to this. To tonight. I'd like nothing more than to… dance. With you. I want it… very much. More than anything." He was speaking more slowly than normal, as though carefully considering each word.

Several seconds passed, Felix staring holes into Sylvain and Sylvain watching him, his eyes peering out from under the fringe of his hair.

Finally Felix dropped his hands to his side and sighed in exasperation, "Fine!" Sylvain broke open into a big smile and he pulled Felix closer.

Dimitri stepped up beside her, a small chuckle leaving his lips. "That was something, huh Professor?"

Byleth faced him and nodded, pride blossoming in her chest. "I'm glad he was finally able to confess his deepest desire to Felix," she said. Becoming a dancer was nothing to be ashamed of, and Felix had finally accepted his friend for who he was.

"Indeed," Dimitri smiled and held his hand out to Byleth. "Shall we begin?"

For some reason, Byleth had expected Dimitri to be in a dress uniform. But he was dressed in casual clothes: a pair of grey pants and a white shirt, tied loosely at the neck. It was almost transparent when the light hit it just right, and Byleth wondered if had he meant to wear something so *revealing*?

Byleth took his outstretched hand. "Pardon me," he said as he carefully pulled her into a starting position. "Follow my lead." He guided her with his arms, their feet moving smoothly.

He was much taller than Byleth and his chest was right in front of her. She found her eyes following along his collarbone, dipping down and disappearing under the edges of his shirt. She could see the lines continuing, and her fingers itched to pull the fabric away to reveal the bare skin.

Her mouth seemed to have too much saliva all of the sudden, and she swallowed rapidly a few times. She was feeling very warm, dancing must be excellent exercise. She tried glancing up and away from his chest, but she found it very difficult to breathe while looking at his face.

"Dimitri," she said softly. He peered down at her and his eyes were such a pure sparkling blue; Byleth felt lost, like drifting endlessly through the sky.

"Yes Professor?" his voice was low and rough.

"You can call me Byleth," she said. Dimitri stumbled slightly, but recovered quickly, not letting her fall. His cheeks were pink and his lips slightly parted. Byleth felt that strange thump in her chest again at the sight, and she wondered what this feeling was. Her discussion with Ingrid earlier suddenly came to mind. "Dimitri, I was wondering if we could speak later, perhaps over tea?" she asked.

Dimitri smiled, "Of course, Prof… Byleth. Is there anything in particular you'd like to discuss?" he asked.

Byleth nodded. "Yes, indeed. I'd like to talk about marriage." Dimitri froze and Byleth jolted at their sudden stop. He suddenly released her and surged backwards, falling onto his butt, his arms thrown behind him. His face was completely scarlet.

"Oh dear, Dimitri! Are you ok? Did you trip on my foot or something?" Byleth asked, immediately putting her hand out to help him up.

"N..n...n...n," Dimitri stammered, shaking his head very fast.

"Hey, you guys ok over there?" Sylvain asked, twirling a flustered looking Felix with one arm.

"I think so," Byleth said, uncertainly. "I was just asking Dimitri if we could speak about marriage."

"What?!" Sylvain said, stopping dead in his tracks, causing Felix to slam into him, tripping them both. They landed in a tangled mess on the ground.

"Oww, you fucking idiot! Don't just stop randomly!" Felix cried, pushing at Sylvain and trying to crawl out from beneath his lanky limbs.

"I..i..i...." Dimitri continued to stammer.

"I didn't mean to cause such a commotion," Byleth said, frowning. Somehow everyone was on the ground except her! She wasn't super familiar with dancing, but still, she was fairly certain that it was supposed to be conducted while upright. "I apologize, I didn't realize marriage was a taboo topic. I just wanted to know more about the process. Rules and regulations, that kind of thing."

Dimitri was still just sitting there. "Wh...wh...wh…".

"Uh Professor, there's no need to rush things. Let the, uh, guy worry about that stuff," Sylvain suggested.

Byleth's lips' pursed and she frowned. "But there is no guy. Ingrid proposed to me, and I don't know the next step. Or if two women could marry?" she tried to explain.

"WHAT?!" all three were shouting now, and Byleth shrunk backwards.

Dimitri looked as though the world had shattered beneath him. His whole body was shaking and his mouth kept moving as though he was speaking, but there were no sounds coming from his mouth. Felix was pushing at Sylvain on top of him, swearing and grumbling in vain. Sylvain was slack-jawed, staring at Byleth with the same kind of expression she had seen on men’s faces when struck with a death blow.

“I… I’m sorry. Perhaps I should go,” Byleth said uneasily and made a hasty retreat. She replayed the scene in her mind, wondering just where she had gone wrong.

****

_ **“BlueLions”** _

HawkBlade: ok, not that I care about you or anything Ingrid, but you should definitely flee for your life

LadiesMan69: wtf. I just… wtf

KnightSquadRiseUp: huh?

MemeTimeHasArrived: wat up?

LadiesMan69: marriage, rlly????

KnightSquadRiseUp: what??

GentleGiant: His Highness is positively enraged, who has upset him??

TastyTreat: oh no, what's wrong

GentleGiant: whoever it is, I fear they are doomed, not even I can stop him now

HawkBlade: Ingrid, this is the only time i will ever say this: u should hide in my room, its ur only chance

LadiesMan69: !! me too Fe, its dangerous out there

HawkBlade: no, u can just die

DelicateFlwrPwr: lilD just stormed past me and broke a piece of the sidewalk wtf

LadiesMan69: marriage. with prof????

KnightSquadRiseUp: ya we discussed marriage

KnightSquadRiseUp: i told you guys earlier, remember? she’s pretty smart

PureBoi: professor is amazing!!

HawkBlade: INGRID!

KnightSquadRiseUp: ??? wat

LadiesMan69: lild com'n to kill u, ingy

KnightSquadRiseUp: but y?

PureBoi: I’m so sorry, but I don’t understand again. Whats going on?

HawkBlade: ingy proposed to prof!

LadiesMan69: ^

KnightSquadRiseUp: omg

MemeTimeHasArrived: what!? Like… why?

StormKitten: ???

PureBoi: that's great, congratulations!!

KnightSquadRiseUp: omg

TastyTreat: no Ashe, not great

PureBoi: o

TastyTreat: this doesn’t make any sense

KnightSquadRiseUp: omg its a misunderstanding

HawkBlade: I knew it. Everyone at this school is an idiot. I knew it

KnightSquadRiseUp: pls som1, tell D its misundrstndg!!!!!

StormKitten: how exactly would there b a misunderstanding about this? Like, just…

KnightSquadRiseUp: i don’t want 2 die

MemeTimeHasArrived: joining this class was the best decision of my life

DelicateFlwrPwr: ikr

AngryDeathCannon: haha RIP Ingrid, u will be missd

PureBoi: should I try to stop Dimitri? I can talk to him

MemeTimeHasArrived: he will crush u like a bug

HawkBlade: no, u will die Ashe. Again, not like i care, but let someone else die, ok?

TastyTreat: I will go. I don’t believe Dimitri will kill me.

KnightSquadRiseUp: pls

StormKitten: nooooo mercie…. Noo…..

LadiesMan69: shes our best shot.

HawkBlade: ok then i’ll talk to prof

LadiesMan69: u???

HawkBlade: yes me! because I'm the only 1 that knows she's a fucking idiot!!!

PureBoi: Felix!

StormKitten: rude

TastyTreat: that's not very nice

LadiesMan69: wow dude. Harsh. I'll come with u

KnightSquadRiseUp: pls save me


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little less humor in this chapter, but I need to advance some story here :)
> 
> KnightSquadRiseUp = Ingrid  
LadiesMan69 = Sylvain  
HawkBlade = Felix  
TastyTreat = Mercedes  
PureBoi = Ashe  
StormKitten = Annette  
MemeTimeHasArrived = Claude  
DelicateFlwrPwr = Hilda  
AngryDeathCannon = Lysithea  
GentleGiant = Dedue  
PrinceLY = Dimitri

Byleth was sitting at her desk and writing some notes in her journal, trying to work through her thoughts, when someone began knocking loudly on her door. She opened it and Felix and Sylvain tumbled in. “Oh, Felix and Sylvain! Are you here to schedule another dance lesson?” 

Felix stormed past her and began pacing around the room, while Sylvain sat in the chair that Byleth had just been sitting in. “You must be a special kind of stupid, is all I can figure.” Felix suddenly said.

“Felix!” Byleth said, “That is not a nice way to speak about your classmate. Sylvain is a capable warrior and your ally. He deserves your respect.”

Felix stopped his pacing and stood with his fingers rubbing the bridge of his nose, slowly shaking his head. “Professor, for once I wasn’t talking about Sylvain. What in the Goddess’ name would make you think that Ingrid wanted to marry you?”

Byleth blinked in surprise at the sudden change in topic. “Well, she asked me, obviously.”

Felix looked up at her, his eyes meeting hers for a rare moment. “Really? Are you certain?” He sat on the other chair, across from Sylvain, leaving Byleth no choice but to remain awkwardly standing in her own room, or sit on the bed. She chose to sit.

Sylvain interjected, “Byleth, what Felix is failing to get across here is that we think there might have been some misunderstandings somewhere. Why don’t you tell us exactly what happened?”

“Well, she spoke to me about how she wanted to be a knight in addition to being a wife. And that she wanted to marry someone close to her. I told her that I would think about it, and she seemed quite pleased. I don’t see how there could possibly be a misunderstanding.” 

Felix leaned forward, “Did she say the words, Professor? Did she actually ASK you to marry her?”

“Of course she did,” Byleth started to say, but as she replayed the conversation in her mind, she realized those exact words hadn’t *exactly* been said. “Well, I mean, not exactly. But it was quite clear.”

“To you perhaps, but I think you may need to consider that what is clear to you is not clear to… well anyone else. Anyone, at all,” Felix said. “Like in all of Fodlan. The whole world, really,” he added, unhelpfully.

“Do you even *want* to marry Ingrid?” Sylvain asked.

“I don’t know. How does one know if they want to marry someone?” Byleth asked.

“Unbelievable,” Felix muttered.

“Well do you love her?” Sylvain asked.

Ah! This was the perfect chance for her to learn more about love. She had been waiting for the right opportunity to speak with Sylvain on this matter. “I don’t know. How does one know if they are in love?”

“Un-fucking-believable!” Felix said, a little louder this time.

Sylvain grinned. “Let me try to explain, Byleth. You’ve definitely asked the right person. I AM the master of love after all. “ He threw his hands behind his head and stretched back comfortably. “So when you like someone, you want to be really close to them. You enjoy looking at them, and you want to see more of them. Much more.”

Felix snorted. “Don’t listen to this insatiable fool; that’s just lust. He doesn’t know what real love is.”

Sylvain suddenly leaned towards Felix. “Really? Whatever do you mean Fe? Why don’t you tell us what love feels like?” he asked, seemingly very interested.

Felix’s face turned red and he looked away. “Shut up.”

“No please continue, I would be very interested as well,” Byleth said, also leaning forwards. “I would appreciate anything you can share about this.”

Felix sputtered and made a choking sound. 

Sylvain had a small smile on his face, and he continued. “Maybe you think about them a lot. And when you look at them, you feel funny in your chest and stomach, like you desperately want them to look at you, but then when they do look at you, you feel nervous and fluttery and can’t bear it. And everything that they do is just the coolest, most charming and amazing thing possible, and other people must be totally blind if they don’t see it too. That the thought of seeing them and being able to be at their side is what motivates you to get out of bed each day. That their fleeting smile is what brings you joy and the flash of their eyes is brighter than the most beautiful sunset. That they make you want to be a better person, the best you possible.”

Felix was alternating his gaze between his hands, clenched on the table, and Sylvain’s endearing stare. Sylvain had reached one of his hands out to Felix’s, and it was lying on the table, palm up, just waiting. Felix spoke softly, “And maybe you don’t know what to say. Maybe you’re just scared shitless. How can you be sure that it’s real, that it won’t just disappear? How can you be sure of how the other person feels?”

Sylvain continued, “You could look for signs. They’re at your side in every battle, trying everything possible to protect you, to not lose you. I mean, sometimes you just have to reach out, right? Take a chance? When the other person makes any excuse to spend more time with you?” 

Byleth thought about their words. “Oh.” She said, and the two jerked apart, Felix practically falling out of his chair, as though he had forgotten she was in the room. “Is that why you wanted Felix to come to dance lessons Sylvain? Are you in love with him?” she asked.

“Holy fucking shit,” Felix gasped, jumping out of the chair, as Sylvain’s entire body stiffened. “A…are you… Fucking hell, I…I have to go. S…sorry,” and Felix stumbled out of the room, slamming the door behind him. Sylvain was still frozen in the chair.

Well that had been sudden. Perhaps the food at dinner had not agreed with him? Byleth had gotten sick a few weeks ago, and the sudden bathroom visits had been most unpleasant. She sighed and turned back to face Sylvain, who still hadn’t moved. “Thank you Sylvain. After listening to you, it’s become most clear to me that I definitely don’t feel that way about Ingrid. I will have to break the news to her; I hope that she is not too upset.”

Sylvain’s mouth was hanging open as he jerkily moved his eyes up to meet hers. “What… just happened?” he asked.

Byleth took a worried step towards him. He was acting like he was in some kind of stupor. She had seen this behavior from men after getting a concussion, had Sylvain perhaps hit his head in their dancing accident earlier? She peered closely into his eyes and he pulled back in alarm. “Just making sure you are uninjured,” she said. She sat back on the bed, and Sylvain seemed to break out of his daze. He was watching her like a cornered animal, as though she might suddenly attack him. 

“I appreciate you taking the time to tell me about love. You’ve given me a lot to think about,” she said. She looked over to the shelf by her bed where the ring Jeralt had given her was resting. Jeralt at least had seemed very certain that there was someone she was growing closer to. “I wonder if it’s someone else….” She said thoughtfully. She looked back at Sylvain. “When you were describing love before… you mentioned that you wanted to be closer to the person, and that you’d like to see more of them, is that right?”

Sylvain was still watching her warily. “Yeah.”

Byleth pursed her lips. “I would like to see more of Dimitri.”

Sylvain smiled. “I’m sure you would.”

Byleth nodded. “Yes, most definitely. All of him. Without clothes would be preferred.”

Sylvain shot up out of his chair, his knee hitting the table and knocking the empty tea set to the ground. “HOLY SHIT!” he yelled.

Byleth’s hand immediately went to her sword at the sudden crash, and every muscle in her body was tense. “Sylvain!” she scolded. “You’ve made a terrible mess.” She knelt down and began picking up the broken pieces of dishware.

“You… you want to see Dimitri… naked?” he whispered and she looked up at his face. He was grinning ear-to-ear.

Byleth suddenly wished she could take back the words she had said. A strange feeling was settling over her, and she kind of wanted to crawl under the bed or disappear. She didn’t like this feeling at all. “Well, I mean… purely from an… educational standpoint. Just to, you know.. uh, evaluate his muscle tone and condition,” she tried to explain, but it didn’t sound very convincing, even to her own ears.

“Uh huh. Right. You should definitely tell him that Professor, I’m sure he’d love to have your help. I mean, purely from an educational standpoint. He’d really love that kind of training, I bet. Make sure you tell him when I’m there though, ok? Just so that there’s no further… misunderstanding,” and Sylvain turned to leave.

******

_ **“BL-lild-hookupsquad”** _

LadiesMan69: big news!!

_ HawkBlade has left the group _

LadiesMan69: :(((((((

MemeTimeHasArrived: howd it go?

LadiesMan69: fckn awful. And also amzng

AngryDeathCannon: could u psssbly be any less clear?

LadiesMan69: prof is dfinitely intrestd in lilD

LadiesMan69: and I do mean that in teh most litrl way. Litrrly

MemeTimeHasArrived: uhhhh

KnightSquadRiseUp: but did u clear up misndrstng? Or am I still going to die?

TastyTreat: I have spoken with Dimitri. He is not going to kill u

KnightSquadRiseUp: bless u Mercie, u are an angel

StormKitten: Absolutley

LadiesMan69: also, i have prof's journal. juicy stuff in here

GentleGiant: that would seem to be most inappropriate

PureBoi: did you... steal it??

TastyTreat: oh dear

LadiesMan69: uh... no, of course not.... uh, i found it.... and it just... like fell open....

MemeTimeHasArrived: omw to ur room. Hilda w/me

DelicateFlwrPwr: alrdy there

LadiesMan69: but guys, I think Felix hates me

PureBoi: so whats new?

DelicateFlwrPwr: Dammmmnnn son

MemeTimeHasArrived: woooahh

TastyTreat: Ashe!!

PureBoi: huh? I thought that was obvious?

LadiesMan69: u have wounded me deeply

*****

_ **DM – “LadiesMan69 – HawkBlade”** _

LadiesMan69: Fe, can we pls talk

LadiesMan69: …

LadiesMan69: pls, Fe. Im serious

LadiesMan69: I didn’t mean for that to happn

LadiesMan69: but is it rlly so bad?

LadiesMan69: u hate me so mch just the thght of it?

LadiesMan69: makeef u soo adngry?

LadiesMan69: I rlly just, I dunnosh wat came ovr me, I jst

LadiesMan69: cmon mannf, I alwys benn lvv u

LadiesMan69: plsss feeee

LadiesMan69: fe

LadiesMan69: ….

LadiesMan69: fefefeef…

HawkBlade: wtf syl, I was training

HawkBlade: are u drunk?

LadiesMan69: yrsh

LadiesMan69: FE!

LadiesMan69: mybe noo.

LadiesMan69: I drnno

HawkBlade: I don’t hate u

HawkBlade: fucking stop drinking. We can talk tomorrow when ur sober. I’m not talking to u drunk

LadiesMan69: ok.fe.. wuvvvk u dtu

HawkBlade: …  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you so much for kudos/comments. I don't really have a plan for this, but I'm thinking like 2-4 more chapters? I dunno lol


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> KnightSquadRiseUp = Ingrid  
LadiesMan69 = Sylvain  
TastyTreat = Mercedes  
PureBoi = Ashe  
StormKitten = Annette  
MemeTimeHasArrived = Claude  
DelicateFlwrPwr = Hilda  
AngryDeathCannon = Lysithea  
GentleGiant = Dedue

Byleth knocked firmly on Felix’s door and it opened a crack, his eyes peering through the slit. “What do you want?” he asked.

“Good morning Felix, may I come in? I have a request,” Byleth said. She wanted to check on his training progress with Pookie, his hawk. If everything was going well, she was hoping he would bring her to class today for a demonstration.

Felix shook his head, “Not a chance. I don’t want to talk to you. This is turning into a shit-storm of massive proportions - this whole fucking place is a disaster zone. And you’re at the center of it.”

Byleth’s brow furrowed - what did he mean by that? She hadn’t been informed of any natural disasters in the area. She would have to check in with Seteth. “I apologize, I wasn’t aware of that,” she said.

Felix blinked at her a few times. “Of course not. You never are.”

Byleth tilted her head in contemplation. She had been through a fair number of catastrophic weather events in her travels, and the key was to be adequately prepared. Wind and flooding were usually the biggest threats. “The walls here are quite sturdy, so we should be fine there; and we can always bunk together on the second floor if the need arises,” she said thoughtfully.

Felix seemed surprised at her words – he had stepped back and let the door fall open. “Wh… what are you even *talking* about?” he asked. 

“Are you suffering from memory problems?” Byleth said, quite concerned at her student’s sudden forgetful nature. Felix wasn’t the brightest student in their class, but he certainly wasn’t the slowest either. He generally had no problems remembering to complete assignments. This was disturbing - he had literally just told her about the incoming storm, and had apparently already forgotten.

Felix brought a hand to his forehead, rubbing with his fingertips, seemingly in pain. A headache was understandable with memory failure. Byleth stepped closer and Felix moved further back, bumping into the wall behind him. He put up a palm, as though trying to ward her away. “Don’t come any closer! You stay away from me. I don’t want to catch whatever the hell is wrong with you.”

Byleth frowned. Was he suffering from paranoia as well? “Felix, this is most worrying. I am not the sick one here. You have nothing to fear from me. I think that we should visit Manuela.”

Felix threw up his hands and began muttering to himself. “What did I do to deserve this, huh? I mean, I may not have been the most polite person, but it’s not like my words are entirely unearned.”

Byleth’s concern ratcheted up a level - he was suffering from a persecution complex as well. She had seen men mentally break before, after the stress of a particularly difficult battle. The best thing now would be to get Felix to the infirmary for evaluation, and begin a treatment plan. If he was unwilling to come peacefully, she could get one of the other students to assist her. Dimitri was right next door, but for some reason Byleth felt hesitant to ask him for help. Sylvain was one door further down though, and he was quite strong. 

“Felix, I am most sincere about this. Please come with me to the infirmary. If you are unwilling to accompany me, I will have to get Sylvain to assist me,” she said firmly. 

Felix’s eyes widened. “S…Sylvain?” he stuttered.

“Indeed. It would be best for everyone if you don’t fight this.” She took his arm slowly and calmly. “Just come along with me now, ok?”

Felix’s body was stiff, and his jaw was tense, teeth clenched. “The Ashen Demon,” he whispered. “You… you really are a demon, aren’t you? Do you actually *enjoy* this? Doing this to me?” he asked.

Byleth nodded and tugged him along. “Of course I enjoy taking care of my students Felix. I’m your Professor, after all. This is my duty.”

*****

_ **“BL-lild-hookupsquad”** _

PureBoi: I’d like to report that I have returned the journal to prof’s room without her knowledge

MemeTimeHasArrived: wtg ashe, I knew those sklls of yours would come in handy

PureBoi: :’(

GentleGiant: Please do not take advantage of Ashe

StormKitten: awwww, I wantd to read the journal too!

DelicateFlwrPwr: np, we have a copy

KnightSquadRiseUp: how did you make a copy in 1 night??

MemeTimeHasArrived: we have a scary powerhouse on our side

AngryDeathCannon: hmph. I used magic of course. U think cpying 1 book is 2 hard for me?

StormKitten: wow, I don’t know that spell, can u teach me?

AngryDeathCannon: maybe. If u can keep up

LadiesMan69: guys, Felix isnt respndng to my txts

PureBoi: was there anything interesting in the journal anyways?

TastyTreat: Ashe! Oh dear

GentleGiant: you are all terrible influences

PureBoi: im just curious :(

DelicateFlwrPwr: hells yes. All kinds of ways she dscrbd lild.

MemeTimeHasArrived: I’m thinking we start dropping them into convos, get her flustered. Try n open her eyes

DelicateFlwrPwr: u know it

KnightSquadRiseUp: like what?

MemeTimeHasArrived: I’ll send some pics, maximum effort here guys, we got 2 wrk together!

PureBoi: teamwork!

KnightSquadRiseUp: im in

LadiesMan69: Felix isn’t in his room either

AngryDeathCannon: ughhh, u r such a whiny child

LadiesMan69: !! just who is calling me a child, now?

KnightSquadRiseUp: chill, he’ll be in class, he nvr skips

*****

Byleth wrote a few things on the chalkboard and turned to face the class. “As you are probably aware, next month is the White Heron Ball. Apparently there will be a dancing competition, and each House will send one representative. Winning this would be quite the boon for our class. Now I will be honest – I already have someone in mind that I would like to send. However, I am always open to suggestions, and if someone had a legitimate request, I want to hear it.

Claude suddenly spoke up, “Excuse me Professor. Dancing is quite rigorous, right? So I think we should pick someone strong and rugged.”

Byleth wrote “strong and rugged” on the board. “Ok,” she said. “Anything else?”

“Personally, I think dancers should be inspiring to look at. Like someone cute and tall,” Hilda said, smiling at Marianne and twirling a quill in her fingers. Marianne was sitting with her hands clasped, staring at her desk.

Byleth wrote “cute and tall” as well. She looked the words over and they seemed… familiar. She felt her face getting warm. “Uh… hmmm, ok. Any…anything else?” she asked.

Ingrid spoke then, adding helpfully, “Dancers need to be someone you can count on. The whole fate of the battle could depend on them. They should be reliable and helpful.”

Byleth wrote “reliable and helpful” on the board underneath the other words. Her face had gone from warm to hot, and she was hit with the overwhelming desire to hide under her desk. That uncomfortable feeling she had felt last night had returned, and she did not like it one bit.

Claude grinned. “Wow that’s an awful lot for one person. Could there really be anyone that meets ALL of those criteria?”

She could think of one person that was all of those things – in fact, she had used those exact words to describe him in her journal. She wanted very badly to cut class short, but there was still 40 minutes of lecture time. “Does anyone want to volunteer?” she asked, her back still facing the class.

Annette’s voice was loud and clear. “Oooh oh, Professor! If no one else wants to do it, I’d be happy to volunteer! I just love dancing!” There was a scuffling sound and an “oof” and Byleth turned to her. Annette was glaring at Claude, and there was a crumpled piece of paper on her desk. “Err, never mind actually…. forget I said that,” she added.

Byleth frowned and looked at Sylvain. She had assumed he would immediately volunteer, considering his long held wish. But he was sitting by himself, fidgeting and looking at the door. “Sylvain?” she asked. He didn’t respond, clearly not paying attention. “Sylvain!” she said, louder and he snapped his eyes to her.

“Oh, uh sorry Professor. Um…. What was the question again?” he asked.

“I wanted to know if you had any ideas about picking a person to be our dancer. Perhaps someone would even like to…. *volunteer*?” she emphasized the last word, looking at him meaningfully.

He shrugged. “Oh, I have no idea. Whatever you think is fine, I’m sure. Say Professor, do you know where Felix is? He never misses class.”

Byleth was annoyed. She had put forth a lot of effort to help Sylvain with his desire to be a dancer, and now it was as if he didn’t even care. “He’s in the infirmary. Please try to focus on the matter at hand.”

Sylvain’s leaned forward. “He’s sick? Felix never gets sick.”

Byleth recognized the worried look on his face. She shouldn’t be too harsh on Sylvain - after all, he had revealed his love to Felix the previous day. It was understandable if he was a bit off. She sighed deeply. “Facing the prospect of love does funny things to people, huh,” she said and smiled faintly.

Sylvain’s eyes widened. “Professor!” he squeaked.

The class had broken into loud whispers and murmurs, and she heard Ashe ask, “Someone is in love with Felix?”

Byleth brought her hand to cover her mouth. Oh no! Had she revealed something confidential? She hadn’t realized! It had never occurred to her that love might be something that should not be openly discussed. “I’m so sorry,” she blurted out. “I didn’t mean it like that. Felix is definitely NOT in love. Not at all,” she said.

The students got noisier and Sylvain’s face had blanched white. His eyes looked clouded over. “He said that? Sorry, but may I be excused?” he asked softly, and Byleth nodded, waving him away. She didn’t know what else to do – revealing a trusted ally’s secret was a terrible faux pas.

She sat at her desk uneasily and shuffled through her papers while the rest of the class settled down. When it became quiet again, she looked back at the board. “I apologize again for that interruption. Let’s return to the matter of selecting a class representative to be dancer. There are a lot of things on this list, and considering that….” She looked over the students and without meaning to, her gaze stopped on Dimitri. He was the one that she had written all of those things about, after all. She licked her lips. “Um, I do believe we have someone that meets the criteria.”

Dimitir was watching her every move and his gaze was intense. She felt as though he was peering deep into her, to her inner-most insecurities. She swallowed. “Err, I think we should select Sylvain,” she said, still staring at Dimitri. He broke their gaze and looked down at the desk in front of him.

“Are you serious right now?” Claude exclaimed. “You can NOT be serious.”

The class erupted into scattered noises again. She was still staring at Dimitri, and he seemed to be slowly sinking down into his chair. 

“Professor. Please. This is… unacceptable,” Ingrid said.

Byleth was confused, why were the students reacting this way? “Is there a problem with my decision? I DID ask for suggestions and volunteers,” she said.

Ashe suddenly stood up. “It’s Dimitri. I mean, obviously, it has to be Dimitri. That list… it’s him exactly! You said so yourself!”

Byleth’s eyes narrowed. “What do you mean, I said so myself?”

Ashe flopped back down into the chair, and hid his face in his hands. “Oh Goddess no, forget I said that.”

Byleth chewed on her lip, feeling very flustered. Ashe was right – the list matched Dimitri exactly. But she knew Sylvain really wanted to be a dancer. And if she offered the position to Dimitri now, it would be as though she was agreeing that he was all of the things listed on the board. 

She turned to Dimitri, who had shrunk about six inches lower in his chair. “Uh, Dimitri… do you want to be a dancer?”

“No Professor, you should follow your instincts. And I definitely don’t want to dance. “ Dimitri met her eyes for a moment, and she felt and unpleasant twist in her stomach. He wasn’t smiling and he looked almost… hurt, like he had sustained an invisible blow. “Actually, uhm, I’m not feeling too well either, may I be excused as well?”

“Yes, go ahead.” Dimitri gathered up his belongings and walked out. Byleth felt something in her eyes, and she dabbed at them. They were damp. She cleared her throat. “Actually, let’s just… dismiss class early, shall we?” she said softly, staring at her fingertips, as her muttering students filed out of the classroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aww, sad times. Things will get better soon :)  
Twitter @baylisself


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> KnightSquadRiseUp = Ingrid  
LadiesMan69 = Sylvain  
TastyTreat = Mercedes  
PureBoi = Ashe  
StormKitten = Annette  
MemeTimeHasArrived = Claude  
DelicateFlwrPwr = Hilda  
AngryDeathCannon = Lysithea  
GentleGiant = Dedue
> 
> Buckle up ya'll, stuffs about to go down!

After class the following day, it was Felix waiting by her desk instead of Dimitri. Dimitri had avoided her gaze during the lecture and had practically sprinted out of the room at the end of class. He wasn’t the only one – Sylvain had sat near the door, on the opposite side of the room from where he usually sat, and had left quickly.

Felix glared at her as the last few students shuffled out. “Felix, are you feeling better?” Byleth asked.

Felix snorted. “Yeah, super great, thanks so much for your concern. What the fuck did you say to Sylvain?”

“I’m sorry?”

“He’s been avoiding me since yesterday. I heard about the fucking catastrophe with Dimitri, but no one will talk to me about Sylvain. So obviously *you* did *something*. What was it?” Felix asked, crossing his arms across his chest and tapping his foot impatiently.

Distracted by Felix’s description of a “catastrophe with Dimitri”, she smoothed the papers on her desk, feeling unsettled. “Uh, whatever would make you think it was me that did something?”

“Are you saying that it *wasn’t* you?” Felix asked doubtfully.

“Ah, well… I didn’t say that.” She folded her hands on her desk. “I owe you an apology Felix. I mistakenly revealed your relationship with Sylvain to the class. I said that you definitely weren’t in love after that, but I suppose it is possible that your classmates did not believe my cover-up.” Felix’s lips were pressed together so tightly, all she could see was a thin line.

He took a step forward menacingly, and Byleth moved automatically at the threat, one leg bracing behind the other and crouching slightly into a defensive stance. Felix stopped and shook his head. “I see. Destroying your relationship was not enough? You had to destroy mine as well?”

“Destroy my relationship? My relationship with whom?” Byleth asked in confusion.

Felix rolled his eyes. “Come on Professor. Even you can’t be *that* oblivious. Who the fuck do you think?”

Felix was meeting her eyes for once, and Byleth wracked her brain, trying to come up with the correct words that would appease him. All she could think about was Dimitri’s back as he had run out of class. She yearned to follow after him and talk with him – to try and fix whatever had gone wrong between them. She’d visited his dorm last night, but he had not been in. She had slept fitfully, an uneasy weight pressing against her chest, almost like the feeling before a particularly dangerous battle. It was all she could think about right now, but Felix was still standing there, waiting for her response.

“Uh… is it… you?” she asked.

Felix scoffed. “Unbelievable. It’s hard to destroy something that doesn’t exist in the first place, isn’t it? You know, I didn’t think there was anyone in the world worse than me at personal relationships, but I’m like a fucking prodigy compared to you. Hell, I’d thank you for making me look good if you weren’t dragging me down with you.”

“I’m trying my best! None of you act like I expect - you’re all so hard to understand!” she finally snapped, frustrated at the feeling that she was losing control over the situation. 

Felix watched her wordlessly for a moment and then sighed. “Fine, I see that. You suck at this, so why don’t you ask for some help or something?”

Oh! She’d anticipated Felix cursing and storming away. But if he was going to offer to help her, she would gladly take it. “Oh thank you Felix. I would be happy to accept your offer of assistance!”

Felix threw his hands up in the air and whirled, marching towards the door. “Why do I even bother? You’re denser than the fucking cathedral pillars. “

“Wait! I thought you were going to help?”

Felix paused, his hand pressed on the door and his back turned to her. “I *meant* get help from someone *else*. Someone that knows what they’re *doing*. Do I look like I know what I’m doing? I just told you I’m bad at this too! Just… just get some help before it’s too late.” He pushed open the door and walked out, suddenly turning and pushing his head back in before leaving. “I’m talking about Dimitri, by the way, just to make things perfectly clear for you. Not me, for fucks sake.” He paused for a moment and then added, “And stay away from me and Sylvain.” The door closed behind him with a bang.

Byleth gathered up the papers on her desk and walked slowly down the hall. Felix's idea had been a good one - she should definitely get some help. But from whom? 

She eventually found herself in front of Jeralt's door, and raised her hand to knock. But she hesitated - she’d already asked Jeralt for help, and she really didn’t want to ask him again. She’d never before faced a challenge she couldn’t overcome, and she was feeling a bit disappointed in herself. She didn’t think Jeralt would chastise her or anything, but still, she didn’t want to see the look on her father’s face when she told him she was failing.

She breathed deeply for a few moments and gave herself a mental shake. No, she would not fail! She was the Ashen Demon, she was not going to give up! She could do this! She just needed… a little nudge in the right direction. She turned brusquely, and knocked firmly on Seteth’s door instead. “Come in,” he called.

Seteth was seated at his desk, three neat stacks of paper laid out before him. “Ah, Professor Byleth, a pleasure to see you. Won’t you sit down?” he beamed at her and motioned to the chair on the other side of the desk. Seteth had originally been very suspicious of her, keeping an ever-watchful eye on her. It had annoyed her, making her job even more difficult than necessary. But she could hardly blame him – she too was suspicious when new mercenaries joined their group. It took several battles before she could trust and rely on newcomers.

Seteth had warmed up to her after she had rescued Flayn from a difficult situation. They’d shared tea a few times and now Byleth felt comfortable asking him for advice.

“Have you selected a student for the dance competition?” he asked.

Byleth winced, having completely forgotten about that. It felt inconsequential at the moment, considering the other problems facing her. “I’m afraid I have not. I was originally planning on having Sylvain do it, since he has always been interested in chasing skirts. But he seemed uninterested when I asked him.”

Seteth stared at her and Byleth noticed one of his eyebrows was twitching. “Chasing… skirts? I, uh, see. I think… perhaps Sylvain would not be the best choice?”

“Why do you say that?” Byleth asked in confusion.

Seteth shifted in his chair, as though he was finding it difficult to find a comfortable position. “Ah, I believe that Sylvain is interested in something… else. And it would not do to have a participant that is unmotivated, especially considering your competition. The Black Eagles have selected Dorothea, and she will prove most challenging to overcome. ”

“Then I am uncertain how to proceed,” Byleth said.

Seteth leaned against his desk, his chin resting in his hand and stroking his beard thoughtfully. “I do not profess to be an expert in dancing on or off the battlefield. However, I believe that in battle a dancer should be passionate about their movements, inspiring those around them. Is there anyone like that in your class?”

Byleth thought over his words. “Dimitri?” Seteth’s lips turned up into a smirk and Byleth cleared her throat and quickly continued. “That is, I believe he is passionate and inspiring to the other *students*.” She emphasized the last word, not liking the knowing look on Seteth’s face. “They follow his lead.” 

“Ah, but a dancer is not a leader. And it would be a shame to lose Dimitri in a battle role – he is one of your strongest fighters, is he not?” Byleth nodded. “I’m afraid that I am not very familiar with the other students in the Blue Lions. What about Annette or Claude?”

Byleth thought it over. Annette had volunteered but had changed her mind. Byleth hadn’t even considered asking Claude. Even if he wasn’t interested, he might have ideas about who would be. He’d only been in the class for a short time and yet seemed to fit in perfectly, chatting easily with everyone. She would ask him to tea and discuss the matter. “Thank you for the suggestion Seteth.”

“Of course. Was there anything else?” he asked after a minute, when she did not get up to leave.

Byleth sighed. “There is, yes. I… need some help with another issue. There seems to be a rift between a student and myself. I was hoping that you might know a way to mend it.”

Seteth stood up and smiled. “I do, actually. I had forgotten to mention it to you earlier, but the Garreg Mach sauna has finally reopened after extensive renovations. I have not tried it myself, but I have heard that it is excellent for deepening bonds amongst colleagues.

A sauna? Byleth had been to a sauna on her travels abroad just a year ago. It had been a wonderful experience, and she had definitely felt closer to the women she had been with. But that wasn’t exactly what she was looking for here. “That wouldn’t work. The student in question is male,” she said.

Seteth tilted his head quizzically. “Is that a problem? The sauna is coed.”

Byleth’s eyes widened and she choked. “Coed?” she whispered. Seteth nodded, as though this was a perfectly normal thing. Garreg Mach was a school! And a church! “Are we talking about the same thing here? Sauna, as in a really hot room, lots of steam?” Byleth was sure there had to be some misunderstanding.

“Yes of course. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have quite a bit of paperwork to do. If you need anything further, you’re welcome to return another time,” he said kindly. 

Byleth left the room in a daze.

******

** **

** _“BL-lild-hookupsquad”_ **

KnightSquadRiseUp: this is miserable. Prof needs help. Like srsly, she’s sinking fast

DelicateFlwrPwr: understatement of the f’ing decade right there

PureBoi: I don’t understand how things have gone so wrong. We had such a good plan

GentleGiant: His Highness will not speak with me

TastyTreat: Sylvain, are u ok?

LadiesMan69: sure. fine

StormKitten: …

Marianne: please don’t lose hope!

DelicateFlwrPwr: shit, Marianne’s right! Come on guys, we can do this!

PureBoi: yeah!

StormKitten: lets do it!

StormKitten: wat r we doin actlly?

LadiesMan69: dunno. watever

PureBoi: :(

MemeTimeHasArrived: ok guys!

MemeTimeHasArrived: I bring you salvation!

AngryDeathCannon: doubt. Srs doubt

MemeTimeHasArrived: Prof asked me to tea

KnightSquadRiseUp: good for u. so what?

MemeTimeHasArrived: u may not know, since u r boring, but there is a sauna now

KnightSquadRiseUp: hey! I’m not boring. Whats a sauna?

MemeTimeHasArrived: ^

DelicateFlwrPwr: lol

AngryDeathCannon: boring and dumb

KnightSquadRiseUp: rude

PureBoi: I don’t know either :(

TastyTreat: a sauna is a room filled with steam, basically

KnightSquadRiseUp: ugh, sounds hot

MemeTimeHasArrived: u know it

KnightSquadRiseUp: *eyeroll

DelicateFlwrPwr: I don’t like 2 get sweaty though

PureBoi: neat! Nvr been to one. But how is tea with prof and going to a sauna related?

TastyTreat: yeah, I like saunas as much as anyone, but it’s not “salvation”

MemeTimeHasArrived: no no, I am going to ask the prof to meet me at the sauna instead of doing tea

DelicateFlwrPwr:… omg brilliant!

PureBoi: huh?

MemeTimeHasArrived: its fail-proof

DelicateFlwrPwr: totes!

StormKitten: did I miss something? What will that accomplish?

MemeTimeHasArrived: send lild instead of me obvs

DelicateFlwrPwr: lock em in there, make em face each other all sweaty and hot

MemeTimeHasArrived: damn, I kinda want to be there too

DelicateFlwrPwr: ikr

KnightSquadRiseUp: r u sure that’s a good idea?

GentleGiant: definitely not! I must protest

StormKitten: how will u get him there?

PureBoi: this sounds dangerous for some reason

DelicateFlwrPwr: aw come on, whats dngrous in a sauna?

MemeTimeHasArrived: Dedue, we need you to convince lild to go. Tell him u r gonna meet him or something

GentleGiant: I cannot lie to His Highness

TastyTreat: I’ll do it

StormKitten: Mercie!

TastyTreat: It wounds me to see my friends hurt. I will help if I can

StormKitten: awwww, u r so sweet mercie <3 <3 <3

MemeTimeHasArrived: an angel in the flesh

DelicateFlwrPwr: yaassss, this is happenin!

******

Byleth paced nervously in the sauna changing room. She’d been surprised when Claude had asked to meet her here instead of for tea, and she’d asked him several times if he was sure. But he already had it all scheduled, and had been quite insistent. 

The sauna experience abroad had been a bit of a culture shock for her, but maybe Faerghus was a lot more open and accepting than she’d known. That being said, Claude had grown up in Almyra, and she was not at all familiar with the traditions there. He’d seemed very nonchalant about the whole thing, so it obviously wasn’t a big deal to him.

Byleth pushed back her shoulders and confidently stepped in, her towel held loosely in her hand. The wave of heat hit her forcefully, and she searched for Claude’s face through the cloud of steam. 

Blue eyes stared at her, wide and shocked. ** _Dimitri!_ **His face was red (from the steam?) and he was gawking at her; the look on his face was like he had been struck full-force by a thoron spell. A strange choking sound came from him as his eyes slowly went down her naked body. Before Byleth could react, he keeled over and slumped to the ground.

He hit his head on the bench on the way down and Byleth gasped and jumped forward, everything else forgotten, and knelt beside him. She put her hand to his head and he was hot, but not unusually so. He must be very sensitive to steam if he had fainted so easily! There was a small bump on his head and he was still unconscious, although he was breathing. She cast a minor heal spell to be on the safe side, cradling his head on her legs so he wouldn’t hit it again when he woke up.

He mumbled and Byleth felt that familiar thump in her chest. It repeated a few times, almost painfully, and she found it difficult to breath and swallow. Part of her wondered if it was related to her faulty heart. She'd been without a heartbeat her whole life, was her time finally up? 

Dimitri mumbled again and she leaned closer to see if she could make out his words. But he fell silent and his eyes were still shut. So she looked at his face instead, her eyes trailing over the angular planes and smooth skin. She had to admit that he was quite handsome. There was no use denying it. His blond hair was wetly stuck to the side of his face, and her finger pushed it aside. He made a soft noise and his eyelashes fluttered. His lips looked soft, and her fingers moved to them, although not touching. She’d *like* to touch them, she thought. She wondered if they were as soft as they looked, or would they be firm, like the rest of him? She suddenly realized this was her chance to see the rest of his muscular body and her eyes moved down to take it in.

He was wearing clothes. ** _Clothes!_ ** Time seemed to slow down and she heard him stammer “P…p…p…prof…” Her eyes jerked back to his face, which had turned an even deeper shade of red. He was staring at her chest, which of course was right in front of his face seeing as how she was cradling his head in her lap. _ Her naked lap! _

Everything clicked together at once and she shrieked, leaping up and away, grabbing for her towel. Dimitri hit the ground with an “ooff”, his head smacking onto the floor with an alarming thud. She wrapped the towel around her as fast as she could and turned back to face him, pressing her back against the door.

He was sitting awkwardly, rubbing the back of his head and wincing, his eyes everywhere except on her. “A…are you ok?” she asked softly.

“No, pretty sure I’m dead,” Dimitri said, matter-of-factly. 

Byleth bit her lip, clenching the top of the towel in her hand. “This is real. Very real.”

“No,” Dimitri insisted, shaking his head and still refusing to look at her. “No.”

“I’m very sorry to have frightened you so, and that you had to see that. I was not aware that you were supposed to wear clothes.” Byleth felt terrible – the sight had obviously upset Dimitri greatly.

_“Sorry that I had to see that…sorry you frightened me…”_ he repeated in a whisper. “You think I… just… what?” 

“I didn’t know you were here. I was under the impression that I was meeting Claude,” Byleth tried to explain.

Dimitri’s body stiffened and he finally looked at her. He pulled himself upright, swaying slightly. His face looked as it did before a battle. “You were going to meet Claude, like… like *that*?” he waved his hand at her now-towel-covered body.

“Yes, I thought that was customary. I’ve never been to a sauna where you wear clothing,” Byleth could feel the situation spiraling out of control, but she didn’t know what to do to stop it. What was she supposed to say?

“And you would have been ok with that? Meeting Claude totally naked. But not me? I shouldn’t be surprised, really, I don’t know why I keep holding out hope; you’ve made your intentions quite clear. I’m very sorry to have ruined your plans for the evening. If you will excuse me, I’ll get out of your way,” Dimitri said, his voice low and hard. He looked away from her again and his shoulders were rigid and his teeth were clenched.

Oh no, it was happening again! “No!” she exclaimed, her voice tinted with an edge of desperation. “I won’t let you leave. Not yet. We need to talk.”

Dimitri growled, “I don’t need to use the door to get out. Although Seteth will be most disappointed that his renovations were destroyed if I exit elsewhere. So I suggest you move.”

“Please,” Byleth whispered, and she stepped away from the door, letting him leave if he wished. “Things have gone all wrong, and I want to talk. Please?”

Dimitri hesitated, his eyes bouncing between her face and the door. “Professor… you don't understand. It’s painful for me. Like this.”

“I’m sorry, I can change back into my regular clothes if you’ll just wait a moment,” she said, realizing that the towel only came to mid-thigh. It was probably a lot more revealing that what Dimitri was comfortable with.

“That’s not what I mean!” Dimitri said firmly. “I… I… I…” he looked at her helplessly. “I like you!” he finally stammered.

Byleth’s brow crinkled in confusion. “Oh, well I like you too Dimitri. I don’t see the problem?”

“Nooo,” Dimitri said, his voice almost whiny. “I mean I *like* like you. I have a crush on you. I’m sorry, it’s embarrassing.”

His words hit Byleth like a lance to the gut, and she gasped. She brought her hands to cover her mouth, towel falling forgotten to the ground. _Dimitri liked her?_ Her mind was a whirlwind of thoughts, spiraling chaotically. What should she do? Say?_ Dimitri liked her! _ She remembered Jeralt’s conversation with her about someone special, about spending time with them and doing special things for them. _ He *liked* liked her, *her*, and… _ She remembered her discussion with Ingrid and the ring on her table. _ She really liked him too. Even more. _ She remembered Sylvain and Felix’s discussion about love. _ Love. She loved him. _

She jumped towards him, not noticing his gaping stare at her once again naked body. “I like you too! No, I love you! Marry me, Dimitri!” she exclaimed, reaching out to grab his hands.

"Ergghh," Dimitri groaned, and fell back, falling to the ground again in a dead faint.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bwaha that was fun and satisfying to write! Byleth is so dense. more chapters comin, 2+  
Hope you enjoyed, thank you for comments & kudos.  
Twitter @baylisself


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